Through The Wilderness: Following Jesus in the 21st Century ~ Marlena Graves

What it Really Means to Listen: Spiritual or Holy Listening

2012-01-28T21:45:00.000-08:00

"My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry . . . ." James 1:19

Spiritual listenting is a contemplative undertaking and not a problem solving task. It is essentially prayer....Spiritual listening as a contemplative discipline pushes us...to a level of listening beyond our own powers of analysis to the grace and the gift of divine life itself....To listen this way is to listen with the heart and mind and open wide. It invites us to be changed along with those to whom we listen.

Wendy Wright, "Desert Listening" Weavings 9:3 (May-June 1994)

Desert ascetics cultivated a heart engaged in intense listening. Listening for the Beloved's voice cultivated a wise and compassionate heart, able to yield to the movement of the Holy Spirit. Listening to the ebbs and flows of the Spirit was fundamental to a life of discernment. A still, focused attention was needed for fruitful discernment. True discernment does not presuppose how the Spirit will move, nor what God will say. In this life of cultivated listening, ascetics were open to the unexpected. They were willing to risk being surprised.

Desert ascetics were deeply aware that their cultural backgrounds, educations, and life experiences framed and influenced listening...Ammas steeped their minds in scripture and other sacred writings in order to cultivate minds and hearts able to listen for God's voice. Growth in self-awareness clarified the lens that filtered and colored their listening. The clearness of the prism was the goal.

~ From Lauren Swan's book: The Forgotten Desert Mothers: Sayings, Lives, and Stories of Early Christian Women

Encouragement to Trust God! One of My Favorite Stories About George Mueller

2012-01-27T04:07:00.000-08:00

George Mueller of Bristol is one of my favorite saints. He lived in the 1800's and was full of faith in God. His desire was to provide for the orphans around him. But how would he do it since the need was great and he didn't have money? He'd do it through prayer, not asking anyone for a penny in order to show that God provides and is completely trustworthy. He'd depend on God to nudge people. So through prayer, without ever asking for help or a handout, he provided food, shelter, and education for 10,000 orphans. God is powerful and good and works through his children. God hears our intercessions. May we be like George Mueller and seek God on behalf of those that have spiritual and physical needs so that he might provide and give us his power and wisdom to bring in as much of Christ's kingdom as we can. It is his doing not ours; we are simply vessels, like George Mueller.

Below I am going to include a little story about him from Streams in the Desert (August 17 for those who have this devotional classic) by L.B. Cowman and edited by James Reiman. I am encouraged every time I read it. I hope you are too!

I have faith in God that it will happen just as he told me (Acts 27:25).

A number of years ago I went to America with a steamship captain who was a very devoted Christian. When we were off the coast of Newfoundland, he said to me, "The last time I sailed here, which was five weeks ago, something happened that revolutionized my Christian life. I had been on the bridge for twenty-four straight hours when George Mueller of Bristol, England, who was a passenger on board, came to me and said, 'Captian, I need to tell you that I must be in Quebec on Saturday afternoon.' 'That is impossible' I replied. 'Very well,' Mueller responded, 'if your ship cannot take me, God will find some other way, for I have never missed an engagement in fifty-seven years. Let's go down to the chartroom to pray.' "I looked at this man of God and thought to myself, 'What lunatic asylum did he escape from?' I had never encountered someone like this. 'Mr. Mueller,' I said, 'do you realize how dense the fog is?" 'No,' he replied. 'My eye is not on the dense fog but on the living God, who controls every circumstance in my life.'

"He then knelt down and prayed one of the most simple prayers I've ever heard. When he had finished, I started to pray, but he put his hand on my shoulder and told me not to pray. He said, 'First, you do not believe God will answer, and second, I BELIEVE HE HAS. Consequently, there is no need whatsoever for you to pray about it.'

"As I looked at him, he said, 'Captain, I have known my Lord fifty-seven years, and there has never been a single day that I have failed to get an audience with the King. Get up, Captain, and open the door, and you will see that the fog is gone.' I got up, and indeed the fog was gone. And on Saturday afternoon George Mueller was in Quebec for his meeting."

Thank you O LORD for a strong reminder of your goodness and power. You are at work. Amen.

Life in the Kingdom of God

2012-01-25T06:48:00.000-08:00

This is a wonderful interview with Dallas Willard where he explains the implications of our theology. He talks about the theology of the Kingdom and the theology of Atonement. We live out our theology and our theology also frames how we share the gospel.

It is definitely a worthwhile read and will help you in understanding gaps in the theology and practice of American Christianity.

Life in the Kingdom of God: Theology

Waiting for Fire to Descend

2012-01-23T06:41:00.000-08:00

"Every morning I lay out the pieces of my life on your altar and watch for fire to descend." Psalm 5:3

Here is a brilliant physicist turned Anglican priest/theologian/philosopher/Benedictine from Wales now living in the US (President of Renovare) who teaches us about reading the Bible. I've met Chris and have been taught by him. I also had an extended conversation with him. He is dripping with humor and wisdom ... a young desert father. I highly recommend his book, Fire of the Word and him as a speaker.

If you're looking for a refreshing and wise and humorous soul for tutelage in the ways of God...here is one. His life and ministry are refreshing because so many American preachers/teachers are full of egoism and striving for numbers. He is not one.

I Wasn't Neurotic Until I Became A Writer (Killing The Desire For Success)

2012-01-22T15:08:00.000-08:00

Here is a piece that I wrote for the Redbud Writer's Guild Blog. It came out last week:

http://www.redbudwritersguild.com/i-wasn%E2%80%99t-neurotic-until-i-became-a-writer#.TxV3A8fH-uQ.twitter

Fighting Calculated Apathy (Acedia)

2012-01-20T13:38:00.000-08:00

"The fathers of the early church who went out into the desert are popularly thought to have been fleeing the evils of civilization. But this is a simplification. They thought of themselves more properly as going out to fight evil. The demons, as well as the angels, were believed to live in the wilderness and there could be confronted and bested in all their horrible destructiveness.

The besetting sin of the desert fathers was acedia or accidie, tellingly described as 'the devil of the noonday sun.' Acedia is spiritual boredom, an indifference to matters of religion, or simple laziness. Symeon the New Theologian wrote to his monks, 'Do not forget your special tasks and your handicraft to walk about aimlessly and in dissipation and so expose yourselves to the demon of accidie.' His remark is almost a commentary on the axiom, 'Idle hands are the devil's workshop.'

The ancient sin of acedia lies at the root of the pastor's or priest's refusal to heed the calling to be the instrument of spiritual growth. In 1977, Carlyle Marney, a distinguished Baptist 'pastor to pastors,' spoke at the seminary where I serve. I remember him asking our students if they thought after ten years they would still love the Lord Jesus or if instead would have become 'hand tamed by the gentry." Of course, he would have been exceedingly suprised if any had confessed that probably the latter would be the case, but the fact is that many ordained persons quickly lose a sense of excitement of the spiritual quest. They succumb to acedia in those forms that are to a degree peculiar to our times, and yet share much with previous centuries of the clergy.

Many of us when we think of the sins of the clergy recall the 'fallen priest' in literature...he was a boozer, a wencher, and had lost his faith. Yet, such a person is less a sinner than he is a casualty. American religion is obssessed with teh 'warm sins' such as illicit sex and gluttony. Because many of us are Donatists--believing the validity of the sacrament depends upon the moral character of the minister, which was condemned as heresy long ago--we become inordinately concerned when warm sins are committed by the ordained. What we fail to realized is that pastor or priest who succumbs to the sins of passion is fallen in the same manner as a fallen soldier. These are demons that threaten anyone who sets out upon the path through chaos. Some will lose.

The sinse that should concern us far more deeply are those that prevent the ordained from ever exercising their spiritual vocation. These 'cold sins' truly violate the mission of the pastor of a pastor to be a symbol, a symbol-bearer, and hermeneut. They arise not from an excess of passion, but a fear of passion. They are the product of a calculated apathy, sustained only by the embers of a dying soul.

Acedia is the root sin of the clergy as spiritual guides. Like a cancer it eats away at our abandonment to the love for God and his creation. It takes a number of forms, which have much in common with those of other centuries but also have their own peculiar twists in our times."

Urban T. Holmes III in Spirituality For Ministry as excerpted in:

A Guide To Prayer For Ministers And Other Servants (Upper Room Books)

American Christianity, Politics & Power Plays

2012-01-18T17:15:00.000-08:00

I thought this was an extremely thoughtful reflection by David Neff:

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2012/march/political-conclave-dangerous.html?start=2

What should I do to please God?

2012-01-17T18:57:00.000-08:00

Today is the Feast of St. Anthony, Father of monasticism, and here is his advice:

"Somebody asked Anthony, 'What shall I do in order to please God?' He replied, 'Do what I tell you, which is this: wherever you go, keep God in mind; whatever you do, follow the example of Holy Scripture; wherever you are, stay there and do not move away in a hurry. If you keep to these guide-lines, you will be saved.'"

Away on Retreat

2012-01-09T07:27:00.000-08:00

I will be away at a Renovare Retreat this week. I look forward to meeting together again when I get back. Hopefully, I'll have some nourishing words to share, words that I received from others.

In the meantime, feel free to scroll down on the right-hand side and see if there is anything here for you.

Blessings,
Marlena

Is There A Way To Measure Humility?

2012-01-06T11:13:00.000-08:00

"So outside of the laboratory, you might observe their behavior for yourself; humble people are relatively down-to-earth, intellectually open-minded, less focused on themselves, and have a relatively accurate view of their own abilities. Then, given recent research on humility, you might look at some of their outcomes to verify your hunch. Humble people have been found to be more helpful, more successful in the workplace, and more forgiving and thankful."

I snagged his excerpt from this study:
http://www.scienceandreligiontoday.com/2012/01/05/how-can-you-tell-how-humble-someone-is/

C.S. Lewis on Success (The Difference Between Good and Bad Ambition)

2012-01-05T04:29:00.000-08:00

From The C.S. Lewis Institute

One of the pervasive problems of American culture is the relentless pursuit of success, which is

spawned by selfish ambition. Interestingly, one seldom hears anything about ambition in the

church today. Indeed, it is regarded as an American virtue, along with motherhood and apple

pie. However, the Bible addresses it differently. In Philippians 1:17 and James 3:14,16, such

ambition is described by the same Greek word that Aristotle employed to describe one who

sought political office by unfair means.Of course, not all ambition is bad. C. S. Lewis helps us distinguish good ambition from bad:

Ambition! We must be careful what we mean by it. If it means the desire to get ahead

of other people – which is what I think it does mean – then it is bad. If it means

simply wanting to do a thing well, then it is good. It isn’t wrong for an actor to want
to act his part as well as it can possibly be acted, but the wish to have his name in
bigger type than the other actors is a bad one.

The Gift of Weakness: Christ's Power Resting on Us

2012-01-03T21:33:00.000-08:00

2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV)

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Sometimes I feel sorry for myself. During those times I recite my liabilities, weaknesses, sins, and station in life to God.

For example:

1. I am a woman. And I love being a woman. I love my husband and daughter and all the goodness that comes from those who surround me. But because I am a woman, people are less inclined to value what I say or write about you (God). People have said, "I am not going to listen to what a woman has to say about God." When a woman speaks the word of God she has less credibility for some reason. It is well-known that people don't read women authors nearly as much nor do they pick up their books nearly as much--especially when like me they are speaking of spiritual formation--of being disciples of Jesus. It's mostly women who read women or listen to women. But women, they pick up both men and women authors and listen to women (although not women pastors so much). So I tell God sometimes, "I am a woman but you gave me the spiritual gifts of men." Well, that's not what I really believe but people in Christian culture label my gifts as male gifts. Maybe I wouldn't have so many problems if I were one of Philip the Evangelist's four daughters. But you oh Lord have given me evangelist/preacher/writer gifts in this century and Philip is not my father.

2. I grew up poor and am poor compared to those in my environment (but I am rich compared to many in the world and U.S.). I am not sure that they know it though. I didn't/don't have the advantages they do. My desire to learn, love of words, education, and surroundings have made me adept at the middle class register.

3. I could write more about severe mental illness and poverty in my family...but I don't think that would be fair to them at this time.

Now I am already tired of reciting my weaknesses or handicaps or social status because of my situation in life. It sounds like I am whining. But I only share this to show what I every now and then recount to the Lord.

But then he gently reminds me that indeed, he made no mistake with my station in life nor my gender. He reminds me that even before the world began he had good works for me to do, works that would make him glad and bring him honor (Ephesians 2:10). He reminds me of how over and over he has been faithful to me. And the other night when I was reciting #1 and some others to him, he reminded me that his strength is made perfect in weakness.

So now I am reveling in II Corinthians 12:9. I am very interested in seeing how he reveals his strength through what many in the world deem to be social handicaps or liabilities. I think I have an inkling into some of it. I often feel super needy of him and of his grace because I don't have all those material and status and familial securities to cling to. Would I love him so if I were in a different station in life? Would I love him less if he didn't parent me? I hope that I would. But maybe I wouldn't.

My intent for this post wasn't to whine. It was really just to share why I am currently reveling in II Corithians 12:9. I want to contemplate it, digest it, and see what nourishment comes from it. Maybe Christ's power will rest on me if I truly see them as gifts instead of curses.

But the thing about Christ's power is that he doesn't always allow us to have full glimpses of the power that is resting on us and flowing through us. Otherwise we might become arrogant or even proud like Satan. There is no grace in pride.

Are you weak too? Maybe for different reasons? God promises to give grace to the humble and to never turn away those who call him. Maybe together we'll discover just how present and powerful and good God is as we meditate on his word and allow him to be our strength.

I liked the Message Version of this passage too.
2 Corinthians 12:7-10 (The Message):

Because of the extravagance of those revelations, and so I wouldn't get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan's angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then he told me,

My grace is enough; it's all you need.

My strength comes into its own in your weakness.

Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.

Cynical & Hostile Toward The Church?

2012-01-02T17:34:00.000-08:00

You love Christ but find yourself cynical and even hostile towards the church. What are the problems and possible solutions in your opinion?

I am honestly interested in your thoughts. Leave them in the comment section.

Blessings to you,

Marlena

Seeking Paradise Favorites of 2011

2012-01-02T12:04:00.000-08:00

"Since the children have flesh and blood, he too shared in their humanity so that by his death he might break the power of him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil—and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death." Hebrews 2:14-15

We're all driven by a desire to make something of ourselves, to find meaning and purpose, to know and be known by another person--to be loved and accepted for who we are. We seek the paradise that was lost, to return to ourselves and to our maker, to the way things were in the beginning. Whether we know it or not, we are seeking to become the people that God created us to be. We are seeking paradise, salvation and escape from death even though we might not be able to articulate what exactly we are doing or searching for.

We do things to attain this feeling of rightness, a feeling of all being okay. It is the feeling of biblical shalom that we seek--a feeling and knowledge that everything is and will be as it should be. But in our twisted states, in our desperate desire for shalom, in our desire for love, joy, and peace, we start to try to manufacture it ourselves.

Some of us do this through being control freaks--in our pain we are slavishly seeking to control ourselves and everyone around us. But in the end, we only make ourselves and everyone around us miserable. Perfectionism--it manifests itself in many ways--even through eating disorders.

Other pains. Maybe we are suffering from depression. So, we sleep our lives away in order to attain some peace. For others of us, our pain drives us to anesthetize ourselves (maybe a different way of dealing with depression). We might anesthetize ourselves through workaholism or illegitimate sex (trying to find solace in a person or virtual person) or by stuffing most minutes of our lives with frenetic activity. Others of us stuff ourselves with alchohol or drugs or food. We try a buffet of gods.

And of course there is the allure of success. We think that climbing the corporate ladder or having our fame and money will satisy the gnawing feeling in our souls that we just can't put our finger on.

Some of us think that marriage is the solution to quelling the ache in our souls.

You see, we (even some Christians) are held in slavery by our fear of death. We fear physical death to be sure, but also a death of who we dream ourselves to be. We fear the death of our dreams. In order to prevent these deaths--because of our fear of death and desire for paradise-- we chase after everything but God, the life-giver and sustainer.

Remember, God gives us life. He always leaves life in his wake. Jesus has come to free us from death--including physical and spiritual death and the death of us (the children of God he created us to be). Death encompasses so much. But Jesus has overcome death. He gives us life (which includes shalom and the fruits of the Spirit) abundantly. He restores life. He restores us to the people he has made us to be. Do we believe this?

In our decisions we are either moving forward in life or in death. That's why God tells us to choose life. We don't have to let the fear of some sort of death lead us into death-dealing and death-making decisions. We don't have to be held captive in slavery by our fear of death. Jesus has set us free. Now, we need to learn to walk in freedom and we need to learn and experience what it means to be free. Sure, because of the Fall, shalom and all the good and all the life God has for us will not be experienced in this life. But my goodness, a lot of it can be.

We need to learn the ways of the Lord, to take Jesus' yoke (his teaching) upon us and learn from him. We learn from him through faithful followers of Jesus whether living or dead, through spiritual disciplines, creation, etc. But we have to intend it. We have to want to move toward and into life. And God will give us life. Sometimes though, in his grace, he rescues us even when we're not looking for him.

My dear one, do you seek paradise, the paradise that was lost? God is restoring it to you and all of creation. I do pray that in some way this blog is life-giving. Turn to him and also ask for help from believers. We're in this together.

Hebrews 2:14-15 along with the Coldplay song, "Paradise" combined in me to bring these thoughts to you today.

The blessing of the Lord Jesus upon you this moment.

Gorging On Excess

2011-12-30T13:08:00.000-08:00

" Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.' So we say with confidence, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?'” Hebrews 13:5,6

Over the Christmas holiday I was thinking about how excess keeps us from truly appreciating what we have and from experiencing God. A shorter word for excessive consumption is gluttony. Gluttony of gifts or food. Gluttony of certain experiences.

Think about it. The first cookie tastes delicious, but by the fifth one, we've lost our appreciation for it. More than a few toys and a child throws the rest aside playing only with those that capture her imagination.

We can gorge on the internet or television or food or relationships or sex or clothes or work or hobbies or success--or even books. Yet as we all know...instead of being filled full we remain dissatisfied. So we start the gorging-dissatisfaction cycle all over again.

Money, prestige, success, power and relationships will not fulfill us. We hear that all of the time. But do we believe this? It's not that any of those things are bad in themselves. It's when they are used illicitly that destruction overtakes us and the world. They become evil when we misuse them and turn them into idols.

What can be done? Detachment from these things through prayer and fasting. For some it'll require a life-long detachment. For others frequent detachment.

When we fast from these things...the things we gorge on...we'll go through detox. We'll suffer all sorts of maladies and delusions--just like an addict going through detox. As we fast we'll see just how attached we are. We'll see what power these things have over us. They've become false gods.

But the truth is that a simpler life, a less excessive life, is hospitable to God and his ways. Remember how Jesus said we can't serve two masters?

How To Receive Abundant Life

2011-12-28T07:27:00.000-08:00

This comes from Sarah Young's 40 Days With Jesus: Celebrating His Presence

"I AM PERPETUALLY WITH YOU, taking care of you. That is the most important fact of your existence. I am not limited by time or space; My Presence with you is a forever-promise. You need not fear the future, for I am already there. When you make that quantum leap into eternity, you will find me awaiting you in heaven. Your future is in My hands; I release it to you day by day, moment by moment. Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow.

I want you to live this day abundantly, seeing all there is to see, doing all there is to do. Don't be distracted by future concerns. Leave them to Me! Each day of life is a glorious gift, but so few people know how to live within the confines of today. Much of their energy for abundant living spills over the time line into tomorrow's worries or past regrets. Their remaining energy is sufficient only for limping through the day, not for living it to the full. I am training you to keep your focus on My Presence in the present. This is how to receive abundant Life, which flows freely from my throne of grace."

Matthew 6:34, James 4:13-15.

God Our Help, God Our Provider - El Shaddai

2011-12-21T12:01:00.000-08:00

Here's an excellent sermon by Tony Evans:

http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/the-alternative/player/the-alternative-239852.html

Encouragement For The Downcast & Gifts of Grace

2011-12-19T21:32:00.000-08:00

"God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them." Hebrews 6:10

Do you ever feel like Job? I do.

What I mean is, I strive to follow and obey Jesus and to do as much good as I can to others. My greatest desire is that others would come to know God (which is eternal life according to John 17:3) and to taste, as I have, the love of God as it is revealed in Jesus Christ. Moreover, I want them to know that God is good (all of the time) and that he is with us and for us. He is all-powerful and is always working on our behalf in this life. He loves and cares for the world and all of creation in particular ways. God is at work all about us, we just need eyes to see him and ears to hear him.

I strive for him with all the energy that is within me--energy I know comes from him. Of course, there are times when I am tired and fail miserably. There are times when my good intentions remain intentions and do not manifest themselves in actions. But still, I can say with a clear conscience that I follow hard after Christ.

Even so, there are times when I get tired. Times when I feel like I want someone's well-being more than they do. Times when I think, "Lord do you not see how I've loved you? Why then the continued affliction, why haven't I seen you move for me?" Being human I wonder, probably just like you, why the wicked prosper (Psalm 73) and seemingly nominal Christians flourish in ways that I want to flourish. Like Job I feel trial upon trial comes upon me with no relief. The trials aren't always my own. They could be the trials of family members or others close by. But in some ways they become my own because I groan in prayer on their behalf.

Then there are times (this happened recently), when I had an idea and others took it and ran with it and received the credit without acknowledging the role I played. It happens all the time in this life. But it's still painful. And that is where humility comes in. The right attitude is: God used it for his glory and he knows my role. But like I said, it can be painful even if my reward is in heaven.

Speaking of rewards in heaven, I do have to believe what Hebrews 6:10 says, "God is not unjust, he will not forget your work or the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them." "God, I help your people," I cry out. "I help them all the time. O God, I need some help myself." God hears these cries of mine. That is why he brought Hebrews 6:10 before me. He is telling me and you that he will not forget our faithfulness. He of all people is faithful and gracious. Our love and faithfulness cannot match the love and faithfulness of God. He wins every time.

But rewards do not just come in heaven. We will be rewarded here, too. God will not forget us here in this life. He will not forget the love and the hard work we've done because of our love for him and others.

When we get to this point of feeling like Job and it happens to all of us at intervals throughout our lives, we have to remember that God showed amazing grace to Job. There are times God's grace breaks into our lives with great surprise. Something good and unexpected happens and we've had nothing to do with it. We didn't strive for it, worry or lose sleep over it.

Can you remember a time in the past when you were surprised by his grace? There has to be one. Think hard.

I can remember times. And the thing is that these moments are not one time events. Gifts of grace occur throughout our lives. So now you and I have something to look forward to. My friend Glandion Carney, an author, spiritual director, and Anglican priest encouraged me with these words last year at a Renovare Retreat. He said, "Marlena, expect great things from God."

His admonition is not limited to me. Each of us should expect great things from God. After all, we are God's children and he loves us. Remember he asks, "Will I give you a stone when you ask for bread or a snake when you ask for a fish ?" (Matt. 7:7-12) The thing we cannot do is dictate how God's love and grace is going to break through in our lives. This is Advent, Jesus is coming. He broke through into our reality as a baby in a manger. His actions are of such seismic proportions that we still cannot comprehend the eternal implications of his overtures. But no one expected for him to come as he did.

So I say to you and to myself: let's expect great things of God, gifts of grace...especially those of us who are tired and feel like Job. They will come.

All we must do is go to him as we are weary and heavy-laden and we will find rest in the goodness of God. Rest in him and expect his goodness. It will manifest itself in the land of the living. It will. Take hope and comfort in this truth dear child of God.

At Home With Christ

2011-12-16T11:56:00.000-08:00

Read this beautiful meditation by Caryll Houselander found at the inward/outward blog sponsored by the Church of the Savior.

http://www.inwardoutward.org/2011/12/10/home

Worry

2011-12-13T21:32:00.000-08:00

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

The other day I started to worry about whether or not and how God was going to answer a long-standing prayer request of mine. I started reciting (to the Lord) all the reasons why, from a human standpoint, things didn't look good for me.

Then I started thinking about Jesus or rather, I believe the Holy Spirit brought to mind the life of Jesus. I thought, "He had good reasons to worry. I wonder if he ever doubted the Father's plans?"

I mean, if I were in charge of planning the salvation of the world, wouldn't I put Jesus in a palace in one of the centers of civilization like Rome or Constantinople or Alexandria or Athens? My thought is that Jesus' influence could radiate out from one of those centers to the then known world. He'd have scholars and artists and business and transportation and trade/travel routes at his disposal. He'd have worldly power, affluence and influence.

But God the Father saw fit to place him in a manger in Bethlehem with humble, poor, non-influential parents. He grew up in Nazareth. What a backwater place. He had no earthly influence or learning to recommend him. However, he did have obedience and humble submission to the Father.

I also wonder if Jesus was tempted to worry about how the Father was going to pull off what to the world seemed like the most foolish of plans: redemption through his death on a cross and resurrection. After all, people were divided about their opinions of him. The most influential people, the Pharisees and those who were part of the Sanhedrin, if they bought into his message at all, it was in secret. Did he worry that "one of these days I am going get knocked off by the palace guard, or some crazy, self-righteous, religious zealot who thinks me a child of the devil"? I wonder if he ever worried about his PR or about whether or not the masses would accept him? At one point he asked his disciples, "Who do you say I am?" He couldn't be sure that they got it either.

My point is that Jesus had lots to worry about and be depressed about. First and foremost: a short life and a horrific death--and then what other people thought of him. I often wonder how worry and depression didn't strangle the life out of him. And of course, I know it's because he had such an intimate relationship with the Father that he wouldn't dream of doubting him, although in the Garden of Gethsemane he may have second-guessed his own ability to go through with the Father's plan.

I think Jesus really believed what he told us in Matthew 6. He believed in the goodness and beneficence of his Father. He knew it from experience. His father gifted the flowers with beauty and birds with food. The Father didn't need the flowers or the birds to remind him of his duty. He is a joyful giver and eternally concerned about the well-being of his children.

But still we worry. Yet Jesus says, "Look, on his own the Father cares for the flowers and the birds. He is interested in their welfare, don't you think he is interested in yours?" And later on he demonstrates he is interested in our welfare because he'd send us a helper, the Holy Spirit.

So after I had these thoughts, I went back to my prayer request. And I was like "God has got this. I am not to worry, but to wait and see how he pulls it off or if he doesn't, what happens instead." To be honest, I think it's going to happen, but I have to wait and see how. I can't plan for it but I do have to do my part in a posture of obedience and trust as I wait on him.

I think about how much less stress we'd all have, if we really would take God at his word and at his character. We are not to worry, that doesn't mean we don't do our part, but that we don't worry about how God is going to do his part. Jesus says we are well cared for--do we believe that even in the most seemingly dire of situations?

I have to practice trusting. My inclination, like yours, is to distrust God and goodness. And so I am waiting and reminding myself of the truths I just jotted down here on the blog.

I'll report back about this situation when things come to pass.

Blessings to you.

A Soul-Killing Experience

2011-12-03T13:49:00.000-08:00

When we think we know the ways of God our so-called familiarity breeds contempt. We don't see our blind spots, only the blind spots of others. If we see only the blind spots of others, only the planks in other people's eyes, then we know something is amiss in us.

Here are the words of George MacDonald:

"Never did she question the truth of what she heard, and she became skilled in its arguments and forms of thought. But the more familiar one becomes with any religious system, while the conscience and will remain unawakened and obedience has not yet begun, the harder it is to enter into the kingdom of heaven. Such familiarity is a soul-killing experience."

~ from The Lady's Confession p. 62.

Speak Up! They Came For Others...Then Me

2011-11-30T11:35:00.000-08:00

First they came for the Communists,

and I didn’t speak up,

because I wasn’t a Communist.

Then they came for the Jews,

and I didn’t speak up,

because I wasn’t a Jew.

Then they came for the Catholics,

and I didn’t speak up,

because I was a Protestant.

Then they came for me,

and by that time there was no one

left to speak up for me.

by Rev. Martin Niemoller, 1945

See more information about Martin Niemoller here.

A Christian or Fox or Something In Between?

2011-11-29T07:17:00.000-08:00

At that very hour some Pharisees came and said to him, “Get away from here, for Herod wants to kill you.” He said to them, “Go and tell that fox for me, ‘Listen, I am casting out demons and performing cures today and tomorrow, and on the third day I finish my work. Luke 13:31-32

What do you do with someone you believe to be a fox? I am talking about Christians that speak about Jesus and their desire to follow him--Christians that go to church and may even share the gospel with others but who commit glaring evils.

I think about the Christians who owned slaves in the South and thought nothing of having slaves or of mistreating their slaves but who would also try to convert their slaves to Jesus.

I am thinking of supervisors who claim to follow Jesus but badly mistreat their workers. They think nothing of ruling with an iron-fist and of hiding or twisting the truth when it comes to their jobs.

I think of the Christians who (as the story is told in one of Erwin Lutzer's books, Hitler and the Cross) heard the cattle cars passing behind their church and the desperate screams of Jewish people and others who were being carted off to slaughter, on their way to the death camps. These Christians in the little church would just sing louder when they heard the train whistle and the screams every Sunday morning. They tried to drown out the screams and the cries of their consciences by singing hymns.

I know all of us are a mix of good and evil. Sometimes we, like Peter, function like Satan and compel Jesus to rebuke us with "Get behind me Satan."

But what do we do when other professing believers commit injustices and salient wrongs --wreaking all sorts of havoc? Yes, we pray. But when do we speak up? When do we take action?

There are believers that are acting like foxes. They may be blind to their behavior or they may be maliciously intentional. I've met a few people I'd call foxes while also wondering if they're brothers and sisters.

At the same time, I must be careful that I myself am not blind to the planks in my own eyes. But what if the plank in their eyes are sticking so far out that every time they turn to the left or the right they take out a bunch of people?

I would love to hear your thoughts. I am truly seeking wisdom in this matter; and I know, our responses may depend on the particularities each situation. But if you have insights, please let me know!

The God Who Comes And Is Always Coming - 1st Sunday of Advent

2011-11-27T12:38:00.000-08:00

Luke 3:1-6
In the fifteenth year of the reign of Tiberius Caesar—when Pontius Pilate was governor of Judea, Herod tetrarch of Galilee, his brother Philip tetrarch of Iturea and Traconitis, and Lysanias tetrarch of Abilene— during the high priesthood of Annas and Caiaphas, the word of God came to John son of Zechariah in the desert. He went into all the country around the Jordan, preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. As is written in the book of the words of Isaiah the prophet: "A voice of one calling in the desert, 'Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for him. Every valley shall be filled in, every mountain and hill made low. The crooked roads shall become straight, the rough ways smooth. And all mankind will see God's salvation.' "

This meditation was originally posted on December 6, 2009

Prepare the Way for the Lord!

In ancient times, inhabitants of cities built wide, straight, smooth roads when kings were coming into the city. The king had to have a special entrance. Craig Barnes tells us that:

One of the most exciting archeological digs going on in Israel is in Beit Shean which is uncovering a great Roman city. If you go there today you can see the main entrance into the city which is a wide, straight, even road, with magnificent columns on either side. That city is located at the juncture of the Jezreel and Jericho valleys. John the Baptist must have been by it all the time. Anyone traveling from Galilee to Jerusalem would have seen it. Everyone knew that a long straight road was what you made when a king was coming.[1]

The Romans spent a lot of time building good roads so that they could expand their empire. Roads were used as trade routes, for foot travel, and to move armies from place to place. And as I said earlier, the best roads were built to welcome the royal entourage. It is said that at the height of the Roman Empire, there were 53,000 miles of good road.[2] Of course the roads fell into disrepair when the empire crumbled. But some of those ancient roads are still used today, although they’ve been paved and repaved over and over again.

During Advent, we wait in joyful expectation preparing for the God who comes, for the God who is always coming as Carlo Carretto so beautifully put it. We need God to come because we are inclined toward destruction. Left to ourselves we make straight paths crooked and smooth places rough. We throw booby traps onto the road, make pot-holes or manholes that people fall into and can’t climb out of. Left to ourselves, we cut paths that depart from the way, the truth, and life without even knowing it, ending up God-knows-where. Left to ourselves, we become destroyers of the road and destroyers of all who pass by—robbing them, beating them up and even killing them. We pollute. We corrupt. We devalue the valuable and value the worthless. So you see, we desperately need the God who comes and is always coming and will eventually come to redeem all things.

I love my husband and daughter infinitely, but at times I say and do things that can destroy, things that mar the beauty of our marriage and family. I cringe as I think about a time when words that I meant for good, had an evil effect in the church, on a friend, because I didn’t think more about how to say them. And you know, as Coldplay sings, sometimes I wonder if I am part of the cure or part of the disease, the destruction. So you see, I desperately need the God who comes, who is coming.

John the Baptist has been considered by some to be the last Old Testament prophet. Although he wasn’t the Messiah, he paved the way for Jesus the Messiah. He was filling religious valleys and excavating spiritual hills and mountains. But his road construction didn’t just affect and threaten the gospel-less religious institutions, his message paved socio-political and economic roads that some didn’t want paved. He both intrigued and threatened Herod in the political establishment. However, neither Herod nor his wife would allow John the Baptist to build inroads. So eventually he lost his head, beheaded on the road to Zion. Sometimes that happens when you make ready the pathways for the Lord. And God will reward those who sacrifice their lives to pave the way for his coming.

John the Baptist still speaks. He speaks to us in the words of Isaiah the prophet in Luke chapter three and calls us to prepare the way for the Lord, to make straight paths for him so that every valley is filled in, and every mountain and hill is made low. Then the crooked roads will become straight and the rough ways smooth. But we’re going to have a hard go of it, a hard time making straight paths for others if we are all crooked inside. And all of us are crooked in some way.

It is said that the phrase, “I am stumped” comes from back in the day when tree stumps were left on wagon trails.[3] Apparently, when the trees weren’t completely taken out, when stumps were left, sometimes wagons got hung up on a stump, thus the phrase, “I’m stumped.”[4] Are we stumping Christ, stumping others or are we currently stumped?

This Advent, Christ is knocking at the door of our hearts asking if he can come in to make the rough places in us smooth. Are we going to be hospitable to God? Are we going to allow him to get to work and fill in the valleys and bring low the hills and mountains in our souls so that we can do the same in the world? We must. For as Saint Teresa of Avila says (as quoted in A Guide To Prayer For Ministers and Other Servants):

Christ has
No body on earth but yours;
No hands but yours;
No feet but yours;
Yours are the eyes
Through which is to look out
Christ’s compassion on the world;
Yours are the feet
With which he is to go about
Doing good;
Yours are the hands
With which he is to bless now.[5]

Missing His Coming

We know Christ came, is coming and will come again, but we need to remind ourselves that it is possible to miss his coming. Many who looked forward to his coming, missed it because he came unexpectedly. Most of the educated religious people of his day missed it. And today, we can miss him because we’re too busy. Too busy paving our own roads while claiming to be doing his work. Notice that the word of God came to John the Baptist in the desert. The desert wilderness was a place where people went to hear God.[6] Sometimes God sends us into the wilderness to get us away from our busy lives, so that we can hear him. Sometimes, we have to pack up and head there ourselves if we are to hear him. What I mean is, we have to have silence and solitude to hear God. It could be in our rooms or in a park in the city. But we have to make time to hear him speak.

Why? Because our incessant busyness puts us in grave danger of missing Christ when he comes. We want to advance ourselves, sometimes in the church or in Christian institutions. So we miss him as we play church or play at Christianity. It is a very real danger. In Matthew 25, at the end of the age, when Jesus rewards those who were hospitable to him, who noticed him when he came, he says, “For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.”[7] We can’t say, Oh Jesus, I wanted to, but I was too busy doing things (or paving my own roads) to welcome you when you came. He’ll tell us to depart, that we never knew him. May that never be for anyone here. May we not miss Jesus when he comes.

I close with a poem written by monk John L’Hereux reprinted in the book, Monk Habits For Everyday People by Dennis Okholm:

Christ came into my room
and stood there
and I was bored to death.
I had work to do.
I wouldn’t have minded
If he’d been crippled
Or something—I do well
With cripples—but he
Just stood there, all face,
And with that d—ned guitar.
I didn’t ask him to sit down:
He’d have stayed all day.
(Let’s be honest. You can
Be crucified just so often;
Then you’ve had it. I mean
You’re useless; no good
To God, let alone
Anybody else.) So I said
To him after a while—
Well, what’s up? What do you want?
And he laughed, stupid,
Said he was just passing by
And thought he’d say hello.
Great, I said, hello.
So he left.
And I was so d—ned mad
I couldn’t even listen
To the radio. I went
And got some coffee.
The trouble with Christ is
He always comes at the wrong time.[8]

Christ is coming this Advent, may we be prepared for his coming and pave the way for him to come into the lives and institutions and the world so that all humankind will see his salvation. Amen.

Originally posted on December 6, 2009
________________________________________________________
[1] Found online at: http://www.natpresch.org/sermon.php?d=1997-12-14%200000
[2] Found online at: http://www.triplenine.org/articles/roadbuilding.asp
[3] Ibid.
[4] Ibid.
[5] Ruben P. Job and Norman Shawchuck, A Guide To Prayer For Ministers And Other Servants, (Nashville: Upper Room Books, 1983), 22.
[6] Found online at: http://www.natpresch.org/sermon.php?d=1997-12-14%200000
[7] Matthew 25:34-37 NIV.
[8] Dennis Okholm, Monk Habits For Everyday People: Benedictine Spirituality for Protestants, (Grand Rapids, Brazos Press, 2007), 88.

God's Comfort In Our Pain

2011-11-24T19:42:00.000-08:00

The Conversations Journal Blog posted some of my thoughts on God's comfort in our wilderness of pain. I pray it'll be a comfort to you.

The Folly of Envy

2011-11-22T07:12:00.000-08:00

What is that to you? You must follow me.” -- John 22:21

Repost from 2009.

Hebrews 12:2 tells us to fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith. Yet at times during the race, we take our eyes off him. What diverts our attention from Christ? Sideline distractions? Other participants?

Imagine running a race and then suddenly hearing the quick strides and controlled breathing of another runner. As the runner approaches, you sneak a quick peek to determine the runner’s proximity to you and whether or not you recognize the face. And then it happens: in the split second it took you to turn your head you drifted off the path, tripped and fell into a ditch. You’re livid. There’s no use getting up now. The other runner is way ahead. You’ll come in last for sure. So you lay there, staring at the sky, sulking in the ditch, bitterly complaining to the Lord, “Why’d you let me fall? You could’ve prevented it. You could’ve made me faster. It’s not fair that so and so is ahead. So and so is always getting ahead of me.” You grow angry at and envious of so and so. As you fume in the ditch, runners pass by. A few slow down, beckoning you to get up and keep running. You ignore them. You’d rather stay wallowing in the ditch of dejection.

In John 21:15-20, Jesus identifies Peter’s calling and reveals details about Peter’s death. Yet Peter didn’t ponder his calling or the specifics of his death. Instead, his first impulse was to turn when he noticed John and ask, “Lord, what about him?” (John 21:21). Peter wants to know what the Lord plans on doing with John’s life and how John would die. Jesus gently rebukes him, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me” (John 21:22). In essence Jesus was saying, “Peter, don’t concern yourself with John, concern yourself with me. Keep your eyes on me, fulfill what I’ve just commissioned you to do and leave John’s life in my hands.”

Do you get tripped up because you’re too busy focusing on others instead of Christ? Do you compare and then become discouraged because of their abilities, beauty, or accomplishments? Do you question God about your own pace and wonder why he hasn’t given you the opportunities he has given them? When you do that, bitterness towards God and envy towards others creeps into your soul. Your race comes to a screeching halt. You’re in the ditch. In the sin filled ditch of envy, we project our values on God acting as if he values the object of our envy and the role he has ordained for him or her to play more than he values us. However, it is we who place a higher value on that person, not God.

When we do this, Jesus says to us, “What is that to you? Follow me.” Jesus did not let any person or thing deter him from accomplishing what he was sent to do.

“Envy is the ulcer of the soul.” --Socrates--

On Loving Others

2011-11-20T20:45:00.000-08:00

From 2008

"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers." I John 3:16

It easy to "love" those far away, those we have little interaction with. We can be patient and kind with those hard-to-love people we run into infrequently. The real test of our love for others is manifested in our day-to-day lives. How do we love those we experience every day? Do we lay our lives down for our spouses, children, parents, neighbors, members of our church community?

Obviously loving is not merely having positive feelings for a person, not merely wishing good upon someone. Dallas Willard says it is acting on behalf of the good of others. Notice in the above verse, John indicates that our love is measured by how well we lay our lives down for our brothers, not our enemies, even though Jesus tells us to love our enemies.

So how are we doing? When we're impatient and annoyed--that's when the real test of love comes. When we're tired and would rather be refreshed than refresh others--do we consider others above ourselves? Choosing to love is a cure for selfishness. Love is a choice because more often than not, we don't want to expend the energy it takes to love others. It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that we can love consistently. And of course, Jesus is our prime example: he laid down his life for us. And out of love and appreciation for him, we lay our lives down for others.

In the Lord's prayer, when we request our daily bread, we need to ask for the strength and energy to love those we encounter. Otherwise, we'll fail miserably.

"Love begins by taking care of the closest ones - the ones at home."
-- Mother Theresa

Downward Mobility ~ Henri Nouwen

2011-11-17T12:32:00.000-08:00

Repost from May 2010

"The compassionate life is the life of downward mobility! In a society in which upward mobility is the norm, downward mobility is not only discouraged but even considered unwise, unhealthy, or downright stupid. Who will freely choose a low-paying job when a high-paying job is being offered? Who will choose poverty when wealth is within reach? Who will choose the hidden place when there is a place in the limelight? Who will choose to be with one person in great need when many people could be helped during the same time? Who will choose to withdraw to a place of solitude and prayer when there are so many urgent demands from all sides?

My whole life I have been surrounded by well-meaning encouragement to go 'higher up,' and the most-used argument was : 'You can do so much good there, for so many people.' But these voices calling me to upward mobility are completely absent from the Gospel. Jesus says: 'Anyone who loves his life loses it; anyone who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life (John 12:25). He also says: 'Unless you become like little children you will never enter the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 18:3). Finally he says: "You know that among the gentiles the rulers lord it over them, and great men make their authority felt; among you this is not to happen. No; anyone who wants to become great among you must be your servant, and anyone who wants to be first among you must be your slave, just as the Son of Man came, not to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many (Matthew 20:25-28).

This is the way of downward mobility, the descending way of Jesus. It is the way toward the poor, the suffering, the marginal, the prisoners, the refugees, the lonely, the hungry, the dying, the tortured, the homeless--toward all who ask for compassion. What do they have to offer? Not success, popularity, or power, but the joy and peace of the children of God."

From Here and Now pp. 138-139

Pervasive Discontentment (Contempt For God)

2011-11-15T19:04:00.000-08:00

Reposted from July 2010.

That night all the people of the community raised their voices and wept aloud. All the Israelites grumbled against Moses and Aaron, and the whole assembly said to them, "If only we had died in Egypt! Or in this desert! Why is the LORD bringing us to this land only to let us fall by the sword? Our wives and children will be taken as plunder. Wouldn't it be better for us to go back to Egypt?" And they said to each other, "We should choose a leader and go back to Egypt. . . . But the whole assembly talked about stoning them. Then the glory of the LORD appeared at the Tent of Meeting to all the Israelites.The LORD said to Moses, "How long will these people treat me with contempt? How long will they refuse to believe in me, in spite of all the miraculous signs I have performed among them? (Numbers 14:1-4, 10-11).

Monotony in our everyday life is no surprise. But what happens when we start to get restless--when things don't go our way? What happens when we feel fettered by our life's circumstances? Do we start to complain? Does wander lust fill our souls so that we'd rather be everywhere and anywhere else but here with the people and situations that surround us? Do we start to hyper-ventilate because we feel confined and restricted?

Think about how restricted Jesus was. He was born into poverty, in a backwater, out-of-the-way place. His friends and family struggled just to make ends meet, to have enough food and clothes for what they needed. He was far from the cultural centers of Athens, Rome, and Alexandria. I doubt the daily conversation stimulated his theological and intellectual curiosity. He chose to limit his power. Very few people knew who he was; others didn't believe he was who he claimed to be so they didn't give him the honor, respect, and glory due his name. Wasn't it better in heaven, where every knew his name and where everyone respected him? But he chose to come here to be despised--to lay his life down for us. It was the will of the Father for the salvation of the world. He was confined for us, but not discontent.

God delivered the Israelites from slavery to the Egyptians. But they didn't do well with not knowing what would happen from day to day. They didn't do well with not being in control of their circumstances. Although God did miracles and spectacularly freed them from bondage--when things began to get a little tough, when they didn't know what to expect, when they started giving into the fear of the giants in the land, forgetting what God had just done, they began to complain. They chucked their trust in God out the window.

They became discontent because what God was doing was not what they had in mind or what they had expected. They figured that after he had delivered them from the Egyptians, they'd cruise through the promised land unencumbered and unopposed. But then the possible opposition in the form of giants caused them to forget everything God had done. They became so discontent, so fearful that they uttered the unimaginable--Egypt was better. Bondage was better to this! They were out of their minds.

And we are just like them. We go out of our spiritual minds when we have to wait on God or when we don't see him working the way we think he should in the time we think he should. We start to question everything. Unlike Jesus who faced so much opposition and bore it with humility and trust, we call God's character into question. We put him on the witness stand--we put God on the dock. We stop depending on him for peace and try to work out circumstances ourselves. We figure that since he ain't doing the job, we might as well give it a try ourselves. We become bitter. We become negative. We color our world and relationships with the darkness of our unbelief.

God renders a harsh judgment for such behavior because such behavior shows contempt for him. I looked up the word contempt and this is what Merriam Webster's Dictionary says it means: 1) the act of despising; the state of mind of one who despises 2) the state of being despised 3) disobedience to or open disrespect of a court or legislature. Here are synonyms: despise, disdain, scorn; also abhorrence, abomination, execration, hate, hatred, loathing.

By all means, let us pray for better circumstances--flee abuse if that is what is happening. But if God has us in normal life circumstances in which we feel uneasy and restless, yet circumstances we are convinced he has allowed us to be in or even appointed us to be in, let us not act like the Israelites by treating God with contempt.

Dear friends, I preach this to myself frequently. This was a sermon to myself first and foremost-- sermon to myself that I share with you.

What Is Choking The Jesus Life Within?

2011-11-14T08:17:00.000-08:00

Some people are like seed along the path, where the word is sown. As soon as they hear it, Satan comes and takes away the word that was sown in them. Others, like seed sown on rocky places, hear the word and at once receive it with joy. But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away. Still others, like seed sown among thorns, hear the word; but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful. Others, like seed sown on good soil, hear the word, accept it, and produce a crop—some thirty, some sixty, some a hundred times what was sown.” Mark 4:15-20

Every now and then it hits me: there are thorns growing in the garden of my life. Thorns that threaten to choke out gospel life, the life of Jesus within. St. Mark tells us that some of these thorns are the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of riches, and the desires for things other than Jesus and his life.

Worries of this life. These can be terrifying days with wars, rumors of war, hate, sickness, family problems, unemployment, and lack of money to make ends meet. We are tempted to allow these concerns to consume us, to become idols that control us. Worry (the cares of this life) feeds our fears and if we don't cut it off, it becomes a powerful force that chokes off God's life in us. It chokes out the gospel. We start to believe our worries are accurate reflections of reality and we bow to them instead of to God. Our eyes become paralyzed. They become laser-focused on our trials and can't move instead focusing on Jesus the author and finisher of our faith. Like Peter, we sink.

This is when we need to turn to Scripture and prayer and to the community of believers so that they can speak truth to us. However, let me not limit truth telling to these avenues. Reading all sorts of literature including stories of saints who have overcome trials can encourage us. But let us cling to God and his word so that our minds will be transformed--because his word cuts deep into us and sets things right (Hebrews 4:12).

When I feel especially overwhelmed, when I worry there is no way out, I think about the Israelites with their backs up against the wall. Pharaoh's army is behind them and the Red Sea in front of them. At that time God did the unimaginable, the unthinkable. He made a way through the sea back then and he does the same for us today. Can you remember a time when God rescued you from a difficult situation even if it was internal?

When I feel trapped, my mind turns to the question God asks in Jeremiah 32:27, "I am the God of all flesh, is there anything too hard for me?" I know he is directing that question to me. I have to answer. Eventually, I have to say, "No, Lord there is nothing that is too hard for you, not even this situation." And so again, I place my trust in the goodness of God (note: placing my trust in God doesn't always happen in an instant. It can be a struggle, but these are things I think about when I am in a difficult situation.)

The Deceitfulness of Riches. We are all tempted to find our security in money instead of God. Jesus said we must choose whether or not we will serve God or money. "If I just have all my school loans paid off and am debt free, I will have peace." "If I just had a better job and got paid more money, I would have no need for anything else." We are deceived into thinking money will provide security. Think of the rich celebrities in our culture; many are tormented even though they are swimming in money. Allowing money or the lack of it to become an idol leads to self-deception and to the gospel being choked out in our lives. We must learn that we cannot find our security in money and instead trust in God who provides what we need.

(Proverbs 30:8-9)

give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.

You can be poor with money as an idol or rich with money as an idol. But let us remember what Jesus says to us in Matthew 6:32, "Your heavenly Father knows what you have need of."

The Desire For Other Things. As I alluded to in other posts, our desires for other things can choke out the gospel. We become selfish and self-centered. For example, we're in ministry and it starts becoming about us instead of God. Somehow in the process, we've lost our first love. We are more focused on our own notoriety and the largeness of our ministry rather than God. Somehow we kid ourselves into thinking we are living for God when really we are living to promote ourselves or to get a nice paycheck. We chase success (spiritual even) instead of God. We enthrone educational degrees, relationships, or a perfect body. These desires for other things choke out the gospel. But what does God say? To love him with all our hearts, souls, and minds, and of course, to love our neighbors as ourselves.

What is choking the Jesus Life in us?

What Would You And I Have Done? What Will We Do?

2011-11-13T19:56:00.000-08:00

My Thoughts On Comprehensive Immigration Reform

Recently I've heard about students who object to what I am about to say because they say, "We shouldn't break the law." But sometimes to do what is right, we have to break an unjust law. Daniel broke the law in Babylon by praying five times a day. As a result, he was thrown in the lion's den. Shadrach, Mishach and Abednego broke an unjust law. They would not bow down and worship the statue. As a result, they were thrown into the furnace. Early Christians broke the law. They continued to meet. They went down into the catacombs or were burnt at the stake.

Those who hid Jews and helped them during World War II broke unjust Nazis laws. Christians all over the world break unjust civil laws by meeting together, by sharing the gospel, and by distributing literature about Jesus. They are breaking their countries' unjust laws.

Also, many who were a part of the underground railroad in the United States--broke the law. Those who didn't abide by Jim Crow laws and those who spoke out against them were retaliated against even though they were doing what was right. History shows they were right; but there were Christians who said back then as they do now, "But you are breaking the law" or "It's the law." What we fail to remember is that laws can be unjust. There were laws here in the U.S. that at one time discriminated against the Germans, Japanese, Chinese, Irish Catholics and others. These were law. But they were unjust. And much injustice resulted from these laws. Travesties, in fact.

Over the years I've asked myself: Would I break the law to hide the Jews? Would I have been an abolitionist or stood with African-Americans and have broken an unjust law during the Civil Rights Movement? Would I have stood together with Native Americans who have been mistreated since the inception of this country?There is no way to know for sure what I would've done back then. I'd like to think that I would have. But all I have is now.

John Perkins, a Christian and founder of Christians for Community Development (CCDA) has said that immigration is the new Civil Rights Movement. I stand for immigration reform now (even if it isn't popular). These are unjust laws that need to be changed. Flagrant human rights abuses are occuring. Families are being torn apart. And these aren't just "those people." They are part of our churches and communities. It is a problem for the Church. Jesus, please help us to change these laws and reach out to our brothers and sisters. If you want to be better informed about what is going on, I welcome you to watch this video from PBS's Frontline Series: http://video.pbs.org/video/2155873891

God Sees And Remembers You

2011-11-11T03:29:00.000-08:00

"She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: 'You are the God who sees me,' for she said, 'I have now seen the One who sees me.' That is why the well was called Beer Lahai Roi; it is still there, between Kadesh and Bered." Genesis 16:13,14.

I don't know where you are this moment as you read these words. Maybe you stumbled across this place by accident. Even if that is the case, I want you to know that God sees and remembers you. Your prayers are heard by God most high (even if you don't know him quite well yet). He does not turn away those who call out to him (those who call on the name of the Lord shall be saved). In Isaiah 42:3 he says that he will not break a bruised reed or as I translate it, "God doesn't kick us when we are down."

Instead, this is the God who says, "do not fear" and "grace and peace be yours in the name of Jesus Christ." Perhaps you are suffering. Maybe you are depressed and not sure that you can survive another day. Maybe you are unemployed--without money, low on food--wondering where your next meal will come from and if you will be able to pay your bills. Perhaps you are chronically or terminally ill. Maybe you lost a child or a spouse or are going through a divorce or are in a bad marriage or are suffocated by your singleness. Or maybe you're in college or just graduated and wondering what will become of your life. Maybe you feel as if you are drowning in your sins.You're lonely. Know that God sees you and remembers you.

I also think of Christians in Iran, Christians in Iraq, Christians in Saudi Arabia, Christians in North Korea, Christians in China --Christians in places where you fear for your life because of your devotion to Jesus. Or maybe you're in one of these places or a place like it and trying to find out who Jesus is and what it means to follow him. Perhaps I can assist you as you read my posts. But know this: God sees you and remembers you.

Abraham and Sarai got impatient with God. God had told them they'd have a child in old age. But sometime during what scholars believe was a 25 year waiting period, they lost faith. "Maybe God meant that someone else would bear my child" Sarai thought. "I know," she said, "I'll tell Abraham to sleep with Hagar and the child she bears will be our child of promise." She decided to play God and concocted a plan. The plan worked--kind of. Hagar became pregnant. But then Hagar began to despise Sarai and then Sarai mistreated Hagar.

Hagar ran away. But God ran after her. He had compassion on her in her distress. He told her to go back to Sarai and Abraham. And he told her that she'd have many descendents. She was moved by the love and compassion God showed her and was overcome by his goodness and love. She named him "The God Who Sees." And she went on to say that she'd seen the one who sees her.

God sees you in your distress and hopelessness. Throw yourself upon his mercy and grace. I often picture myself leaping into white robes...my way of throwing myself on God's mercy and grace...my way of banking on his goodness and love. In Jesus Christ, God has said "Immanuel" ... I am with you. Immanuel means "God with us." When Jesus came to earth as a baby (soon we will be celebrating Advent) the angels proclaimed that it was good news and great joy for all people.

Like the father in the story of the prodigal son, God says to you and me "Everything I have is yours." I pray that wherever you are that he would open your eyes to his presence and care and that he would open mine, too. I pray that you would see that everything he has is yours if you are his child.

Remember, God speaks to us through his words and in others ways. He speaks to us through his people and creation. Maybe this little post is his way of encouraging you, of reminding you that he sees you and remembers you. I will pray that you become aware of his eye beholding you and of his arm that is not too short to save.

How Power Corrupts

2011-11-08T13:58:00.000-08:00

"We grew older, and we came to understand one of the central truths of human nature, which is that when you brush up against a truly powerful force, it is never quite as benevolent as you imagined it to be. In order to acquire power, you have to be at least a little ruthless.⁵ All you can hope for is that those who do acquire power operate by some sort of rough ethical standard, and even if I no longer deified Paterno, I continued to believe that the monolith I'd grown up inside was essentially a force for good. They did things I found untoward, but I always presumed they did them for the right reasons . . . . "

This comes from this article, a reflection on the Penn State scandal where young men were sexually abused and no one spoke up--all to save a football program. See the article here: http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/7205085/growing-penn-state

This sometimes happens in the church too.

Workers Not Master Builders

2011-11-07T14:26:00.000-08:00

A repost from 2010 - In honor of All Saints

"It helps, now and then, to step back and take a long view.

The kingdom is not only beyond our efforts,
it is even beyond our vision.
We accomplish in our lifetime only a tiny fraction

of the magnificent enterprise that is God’s work.

Nothing we do is complete, which is a way of saying

that the kingdom always lies beyond us.

No statement says all that could be said.
No prayer fully expresses our faith.
No confession brings perfection.
No pastoral visit brings wholeness.
No program accomplishes the church’s mission.
No set of goals and objectives includes everything.
This is what we are about.
We plant the seeds that one day will grow.
We water seeds already planted,
knowing that they hold future promise.
We lay foundations that will need further development.
We provide yeast that produces far beyond our capabilities.
We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of liberation
in realizing that. This enables us to do something,
and to do it very well. It may be incomplete,
but it is a beginning, a step along the way,
an opportunity for the Lord’s grace to enter and do the rest.
We may never see the end results, but that is the difference
between the master builder and the worker.
We are workers, not master builders; ministers, not messiahs.
We are prophets of a future not our own.
Amen."

Seeking Paradise

2011-11-01T18:16:00.000-07:00

We're all driven by a desire to make something of ourselves, to find meaning and purpose, to know and be known by another person--to be loved and accepted for who we are. We seek the paradise that was lost, to return to ourselves and to our maker, to the way things were in the beginning. Whether we know it or not, we are seeking to become the people that God created us to be. We are seeking paradise, salvation and escape from death even though we might not be able to articulate what exactly we are doing or searching for.

We do things to attain this feeling of rightness, a feeling of all being okay. It is the feeling of biblical shalom that we seek--a feeling and knowledge that everything is and will be as it should be. But in our twisted states, in our desperate desire for shalom, in our desire for love, joy, and peace, we start to try to manufacture it ourselves.

Some of us do this through being control freaks--in our pain we are slavishly seeking to control ourselves and everyone around us. But in the end, we only make ourselves and everyone around us miserable. Perfectionism--it manifests itself in many ways--even through eating disorders.

Other pains. Maybe we are suffering from depression. So, we sleep our lives away in order to attain some peace. For others of us, our pain drives us to anesthetize ourselves (maybe a different way of dealing with depression). We might anesthetize ourselves through workaholism or illegitimate sex (trying to find solace in a person or virtual person) or by stuffing most minutes of our lives with frenetic activity. Others of us stuff ourselves with alchohol or drugs or food. We try a buffet of gods.

And of course there is the allure of success. We think that climbing the corporate ladder or having our fame and money will satisy the gnawing feeling in our souls that we just can't put our finger on.
Some of us think that marriage is the solution to quelling the ache in our souls.

You see, we (even some Christians) are held in slavery by our fear of death. We fear physical death to be sure, but also a death of who we dream ourselves to be. We fear the death of our dreams. In order to prevent these deaths--because of our fear of death and desire for paradise-- we chase after everything but God, the life-giver and sustainer.

Remember, God gives us life. He always leaves life in his wake. Jesus has come to free us from death--including physical and spiritual death and the death of us (the children of God he created us to be). Death encompasses so much. But Jesus has overcome death. He gives us life (which includes shalom and the fruits of the Spirit) abundantly. He restores life. He restores us to the people he has made us to be. Do we believe this?

In our decisions we are either moving forward in life or in death. That's why God tells us to choose life. We don't have to let the fear of some sort of death lead us into death-dealing and death-making decisions. We don't have to be held captive in slavery by our fear of death. Jesus has set us free. Now, we need to learn to walk in freedom and we need to learn and experience what it means to be free. Sure, because of the Fall, shalom and all the good and all the life God has for us will not be experienced in this life. But my goodness, a lot of it can be.

We need to learn the ways of the Lord, to take Jesus' yoke (his teaching) upon us and learn from him. We learn from him through faithful followers of Jesus whether living or dead, through spiritual disciplines, creation, etc. But we have to intend it. We have to want to move toward and into life. And God will give us life. Sometimes though, in his grace, he rescues us even when we're not looking for him.

My dear one, do you seek paradise, the paradise that was lost? God is restoring it to you and all of creation. I do pray that in some way this blog is life-giving. Turn to him and also ask for help from believers. We're in this together.

Hebrews 2:14-15 along with the Coldplay song, "Paradise" combined in me to bring these thoughts to you today.

The blessing of the Lord Jesus upon you this moment.

Oceans of Justice

2011-10-29T01:20:00.000-07:00

I've been sick and out of commission for a little bit. I will explain more another day. Here it what I am thinking about today. This is from Amos 5, the Message version:

I can't stand your religious meetings.

I'm fed up with your conferences and conventions.

I want nothing to do with your religion projects,

your pretentious slogans and goals.

I'm sick of your fund-raising schemes,

your public relations and image making.

I've had all I can take of your noisy ego-music.

When was the last time you sang to me?

Do you know what I want?

I want justice—oceans of it.

I want fairness—rivers of it.

That's what I want. That's all I want.

God's Power At Work Within US

2011-10-14T06:52:00.000-07:00

This is an encouraging sermon from pastor Ed Marquart out of Seattle: http://www.sermonsfromseattle.com/books_ephesians_thepower.htm

Driving Drunk On Sin

2011-10-08T19:41:00.000-07:00

When we have a sin that we nurse whether it be the likes of pride, greed, coveteousness, idolatry, or sexual immorality--whatever it is, it impedes our judgment. It is as if we are driving down the road of life drunk. The truth is we're liable to injure or kill ourselves and any others that cross our path. But most of the time we are denial that such is the case. Like a drunk person, we think our judgment is fine enough to drive and so we get in the car.

In August, Shawn and I attended a late afternoon wedding. By the time we exited the banquet center, it was pushing on ten-thirty. On the sidewalk, we happened to fall in line behind a man who was stumbling his way toward the parking lot. He was swerving while walking. We were very uncomfortable with what was transpiring before us. I said to Shawn, "Surely he doesn't plan on driving." Well, we followed him because our car was in the direction he was headed.

He approached his sporty Cadillac and just leaned on it. Shawn asked him if he was okay and if he needed any help (which he obviously did). He rejected Shawn's offer of help. So we got in our car and kept an eye on him. We saw him fumbling for his keys and attempting to unlock his car. I called 911. There was no way Shawn or I could in a good conscience let him drive away--if he could get into his car. We stayed in the parking lot until the police arrived and then headed home.

And so the story reminds me of what we are like in our sin. Whether we are addicted to fame or money or getting affirmation or porn or if we're full of anger and selfishness and bitterness--whether we are physically lazy or too lazy to follow Jesus --sin impedes our judgment and leads to ruin if we do not repent.

To be free from sin, we need to repent and call it what it is, but we also need the help of trusted community to assist us in our freedom in Christ so that we do not return to slavery. Freedom will come even if little by little.

Let's take sin seriously less we injure or kill ourselves or those around us. It is very possible that some souls will not recover from the injury we have done to them in ignorance (or with full knowledge). So if we are aware of our sin, let us cry out to God. If we are not, let us ask God to show us if there is anything in us that is damaging to ourselves or to others.

Forced Desert Retreats

2011-10-02T21:11:00.000-07:00

This meditation of mine appeared in the Conversations Journal blog. I thought it might be helpful to you!
http://conversationsjournal.com/2011/09/forced-desert-retreats/

Measuring Delight

2011-09-28T06:03:00.000-07:00

Oh how our views about God siffon off the eternal life that is waiting to burst forth in and through us! But here's an image for you and for me, one we should contemplate for our good.

God our dear father has placed a huge box in front of us. It is a shiny gold box, quite large, with a royal red bow carefully and lovingly tied to it. It's one of those beautiful fancy bows. Our father is eager and expectant in his anticipation, giddy as he waits for us to unwrap the gift. Using Father Greg Boyle's words, God can't wait to "measure our delight." As we peek into the box, we'll be floored by an untamable never-ending joy. We will with our father throw our heads back in delight, mouths agape with the laughter of joy and goodness. Laughter will wrack our bodies, our bellies will quake, mouths will hurt from the perpetual grin, and tears will stream out of our eyes because of his almost incredible goodness to us. We can barely believe it, but it's true. This is the way of our God, our Father. And this gift is not just for the life to come.

The gift is sitting before us. We can unwrap it moment by moment.

Contemplate the image, the image of our giddy joyful father full of expectation, waiting for us to open the gift of eternal life.Can you see the delight in his eyes?

Remember what he said to the older brother in the story of the prodigal? "All that I have is yours." He is our father. Everything he has is ours. Are we immersing ourselves in all that is ours, using it, relishing it, delighting in it? In 2 Peter 1 he tells us that he has given us everything we need for life and godliness.

God is not stiff, cold, stingy, or uncaring. He is our father whose love for us makes him giddy with joy because he delights in us so. He provides.

Receive the gift of eternal life (life now and forevermore) and all its implications--the fruits of the Spirit--justice and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit (Romans 4:17b).

Receive his gift and provision.

The gift of abudant eternal life.

The Basics

2011-09-26T18:05:00.000-07:00

We get all out of sorts all of the time don't we? Disoriented. We wonder where God is at, wonder why there seems to be no deepening in our relationship with him or much goodness blossoming in the world. Instead of walking away from the person we were a moment ago we find ourselves walking toward the person we don't want to be--walking toward the person we were a moment ago.

Why is it that we find ourselves constantly in such a state, a state where there seems to be no growth in grace? Well, obviously there is not a simple answer, but I think I can add a piece to the puzzle of the answer. A piece that you and I are familiar with, but one that we need to be reminded exists.

It could be that our perceptions are just jazzed up or it could be failure to engage in the basics.

The basics. You know how eight hours sleep, healthy eating, and excercise are of great help in living a salutatory life? Likewise so are the basics of prayer, solitude, fellowship, service, confession of sins, the reading of Scripture, and celebration of great help in the spiritual component that makes up our life.

The problem is, it's so hard for us to do the basics in the physical part of our life as well as in the spiritual part of our life. They are both part of the same life and so I don't want to dis-integrate them. Our physical part of life affects our spiritual part of life and vice versa.

So why don't we pray for grace to do the basics? Pick one thing? It's impossible to change all at once. But God working through us and in conjunction with decisions of our will--does bring about change. Little by little.

I encourage you and myself to pick one of the basics and ask God for grace to make it a habit in our lives. The more of the basics that we practice the more peace and stability in our lives. May this truth travel what appears to be the short distance between our heads and our hearts.

Henri Nouwen - Downward Mobility

2011-09-16T11:38:00.000-07:00

Properly Ordered Love

2011-09-10T18:30:00.000-07:00

This is from my friend Karen Swallow-Prior.

In On Christian Doctrine, St. Augustine defines justice as loving things in proper measure. In Book One of that work, Augustine writes,

Now he is a man of just and holy life who forms an unprejudiced estimate of things, and keeps his affections also under strict control, so that he neither loves what he ought not to love, nor fails to love what he ought to love, nor loves that more which ought to be loved less, nor loves that equally which ought to be loved either less or more, nor loves that less or more which ought to be loved equally.

Godliness With Contentment

2011-09-05T21:22:00.000-07:00

Paul says that godliness with contentment is great gain. Having the character of God with contentment in God is soul-wealth. But can we manufacture our own contentment?

Not really.

However, we can cultivate a posture and discipline of gratitude. And we can surrender our fears, our discontentment, and sometimes accutely painful present to God. In my last post, I wrote: "the key to peace is surrender." It was something I believe Dallas Willard (or one of our retreat directors) said.

Ever since I reread that statement in my journal I decided, to the best of my ability, to practice the surrender of a particular pain and dissatisfaction. Sometimes daily, sometimes moment by moment surrender has been required of me.

But, I wanted to report to you that the insight is correct. Peace follows our surrender. I surrendered and continue to surrender this particular circumstance. For full disclosure, it has taken me five years to get to the point where I comprehend what it means for me to surrender what has up until this point been a thorn. Sometimes it takes a while for God to work in us and for us to work out our salvation with fear and treambling; purification isn't instantaneous.

For me it has meant kissing a dream good-bye. It means accepting the possibility that this dream may never materialize into reality. It means trusting that if the Lord chooses not to grant me this desire that he is and will continue to fill me with shalom without granting me this desire.

I've been very content, more joyful, and thankful.

Very little has changed in my outward circumstances. But I do remember the song that the Taize Community sings from Romans chapter 4: "The kingdom of God is justice and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit."

All this to say, more and more I am experiencing contentment with what I hope is godliness in my life. And it's not hit-and-miss contentment. This is not to say that I don't have my share of sadnesses. But there is this underlying shalom in my soul that is bubbling up like a spring. I do hope that it spills forth into my environment and to yours, too.

Remember, God is a peacemaker. He wants to bring contentment to your soul--Jesus says when we take his teaching or yoke upon us, and go to him, we'll find rest for our souls. In turn, as his shalom fills us, he uses us in his great world-wide divine conspiracy to overcome evil with good, to reconcile all things to himself. God desires to bring peace on earth, good will to all people. It's part of the good news that the angels proclaimed when Jesus was born. It is gospel.

Receive it.

Your peace and shalom has eternal implications not only for your own life, but for everyone and everything you touch.

The Key To Peace

2011-08-30T14:08:00.000-07:00

"God, my shepherd! I don't need a thing. You have bedded me down in lush meadows, you find me quiet pools to drink from. True to your word, you let me catch my breath and send me in the right direction."

Psalm 23: 1-3 (The Message Version)

Do we really believe that God makes us lie down in green pastures, or lush meadows? Or is He a negligent shepherd who provides scraggly, straw-like grass for us to attempt to rest in? Grass that pricks us, grass that is uncomfortable? Grass that is full of fleas and biting bugs such as red ants and pesky flies that torture us? Are we dying of thirst because he has failed to provide us with water? Are we emaciated sheep because our shepherd is slowly starving us?

Sheep do not lie down unless they feel completely safe. Do we feel safe enough in the arms of our shepherd to relax? I wrote down in my journal something I believe that Dallas Willard said at one of our Renovare Retreats. It was this: the key to peace is surrender.

I thought about how I can never sleep in a car or in an airplane. I have to be able to stretch completely out to be relaxed. And another reason I don't like to sleep in public is because I am out of control; I can't control whether or not someone is looking at me (and therefore hide my face as I sleep), what my face looks like when I sleep, or whether or not I drool.

I envy those people who can sleep anywhere. So cross continental or trans-continental flights are exhausting unless I put my head on the tray in front of me, face down, resting on my arms. Only then will I fade in and out of light sleep.

The only person whose arms I feel safe enough to relax in are my husband's. With him my intensities go limp. I have confidence in him. I trust him. And that is how I need to be with the Lord--for me to have peace I need to surrender control to Him. He is good. He is not going to leave me wanting.

I think of Isaiah 40:11 (NIV): "He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms

and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young."

I can unwind in the arms of God. I can trust that he has gently placed me by still waters and in green pastures where I can drink and bathe and sleep in peace--internal peace. If a wolf or another predator should come to attack me, He is going to take his rod and run after it. He won't let a predator take away my eternal life or my peace. I am the one who gives up peace. If a predator of disease or natural disaster or accident should attack my body, I know I am still safe in the Shepherd's arms. He gives me abundant life, everlasting life. That death attack will be my next step into the rest of life.

But my question to you as well as to myself is what do we really believe about God? It is a good question to ask ourselves when things aren't going the way we want them to, when we are suffering. Because when we do suffer, what we believe about God comes to the fore.

Ask yourself and I will ask myself: Are we mal-nourished, starving sheep trying to relax on a scratchy, flea-bitten piece of earth, panting for water and nearing dehydration? Or are we filled to overflowing, content in the Shepherd's care?

If there is a problem, it never lies with God's character or with his care of us. It's with our perceptions and perhaps obedience or lack of it. If we are not experiencing the fullness and care of God, let us not berate ourselves. Our shepherd wouldn't want that. No, let's ask him for eyes to see and ears to hear. Let us open our mouths wide like baby birds that he might feed us.

Peace will come as we surrender and open our mouths while relaxing in his presence.

Kitchen Scraps and Tractors

2011-08-27T11:17:00.000-07:00

This is a meditation from my friend Susan Green the Executive Director at Scenic City Women's Network in Chattanooga, TN USA

“We are – each and every one of us – a tangled mass of motives: hope and fear, faith and doubt, simplicity and duplicity, honesty and falsity, openness and guile. God knows our hearts better than we ever can. He is the only one who can separate the true from the false; he alone can purify the motives of the heart. But he does not come uninvited. If chambers of our heart have never experienced the healing touch, perhaps it is because we have not welcomed the divine scrutiny.

The most important, the most real, the most lasting work is accomplished in the depths of our heart. This work is solitary and interior. It cannot be seen by anyone, even ourselves. It is a work known only to God. It is the work of heart purity, soul conversion, life transfiguration.

Though we cannot see the work itself, we can detect some of its effects. We can experience a new firmness of life-orientation. We experience a settled peace that we do not fully understand and cannot fully explain. We begin seeing everything in the light of God’s overriding governance for good. And, most amazing of all, we begin to feel abiding, unconditional warm regard for all people.”

- Richard Foster – Streams of Living Water

A few years ago I bought a CD, “singing bones”, by The Handsome Family. I don’t remember now who introduced them to me, but their music and lyrics are interesting and tell intriguing stories. Lyrics and credits information is wittily followed by their contact information for “the curious or angry.” I’d count myself in the former category.

One of my favorite CD selections is “The Bottomless Hole”. In the song “kitchen scraps and dead cows…tractors broken down” have for years been thrown down a hole in the backyard of a man from Ohio, and he’s never once heard them hit bottom. So he rigs himself a roped chariot to ride down the hole in search of its bottom. The rope could only take him so far, so he kisses his wife and children goodbye, and continues his pursuit. The song ends with him still sinking down that hole.

As I listened to this story it made me think of the depths of darkness in each human heart and of our continual pursuit of dark things that always cut us off from what is real, important, and beautiful, and from the people around us who need our love.

In the song, it had become a perpetual habit for the man in Ohio to toss things down that hole. The tossing started small, just kitchen scraps, and then tossed away things got bigger, and throwing things down that hole became a free-falling, black and consuming abyss. Pursuit of those things became more important than his wife and kids.

Doesn’t this scenario seem a bit extreme? Like the man from Ohio, habits and patterns do become a life pursuit for us, so we should be honest about the kind of life we are pursuing. In the gospels, whenever Jesus came on the scene, out of love, He put his finger on the things keeping people from a bottomless free-fall life imitation.

If we allow God to look with us at what is really true about us, He will show us, and our free-falling can end. Light exposes darkness and love overcomes fear. But just seeing truth, like the rich young ruler, isn’t enough. We have to make a choice about the truth we see. We have to want a certain kind of life and pursue it.

We have an enemy who longs to see us in perpetual free-falling. But, we have a God who will help us see the bottom of our big hole if we want to see it. We can only see truth with God’s help and we can learn from Him how to fill our lives with good things. And seeing truth needs to become one of the habits we pursue.

It’s hard to imagine that we couldn’t see something as big as a tractor – but sometimes, even things that big, we can’t see without God’s help. Only God can help us unearth, redeem, and see that good can be brought out of big scary things. The cry of David for God to know us (Psalm 139) and to be led in the everlasting way isn’t something we should fear, but something for which we should long. Richard Foster calls this way of allowing God to look with us at our life “a scrutiny of love.” The image evoked by those words brings tears to my eyes. Jesus wants you and me to daily experience true life. Only with God’s help can see that our kitchen scraps that lead to tractors, and work with Him to change, to discover our firm foundation for standing. Lives filled with light overcome darkness, the Kingdom is brought to earth, and God is glorified.

How Not To Marry The Wrong Christian

2011-08-24T10:09:00.001-07:00

This is my latest post for Christianity Today's Her.meneutics Blog. Perhaps it'll be of help to some of you!

http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2011/08/how_to_avoid_marrying_the_wron.html

Mean Thoughts . . . Sharon Hodde Miller

2011-08-20T18:42:00.000-07:00

I thought this was a great post by Sharon Hodde Miller (she is a fellow Her.meneutics writer).

Thanks Sharon!

http://sheworships.com/2011/07/06/mean-thoughts/

Listen To Theology or Else . . .

2011-08-17T10:26:00.000-07:00

"If you do not listen to Theology, that will not mean that you have no ideas about God. It will mean that you have a lot of wrong ones—bad, muddled, out-of-date ideas. For a great many of the ideas about God which are trotted out as novelties today, are simply the ones which real Theologians tried centuries ago and rejected."

C. S. Lewis

Thanks to Lewis for this delicious truth. If you learn Church history and historical theology you'll see there is no new heresy found under the sun. You'll also learn of a great many good, true, and beautiful thoughts about God that were considered long ago. These will nourish you.

Evil Hiding Among The Good

2011-08-15T20:34:00.000-07:00

"In his People of the Lie, M. Scott Peck says that if one is looking for genuine evil, then one ought to look first within the synagogue and church. It is the nature of evil to 'hide among the good.' Satan masquerades as an angel of light. Lucifer is his name, after all. Leaders of the church beware, not only because we work among the godly, but also because we ourselves, called to speak to and for God and to God's people, are in a morally vulnerable position where sin is always lurking about the door (Gen. 4:7)."

Will Willimon in his book Pastor: The Theology and Practice of Ordained Ministry. p. 266

The Speed of Godliness vs. The Speed of Technology

2011-08-11T19:06:00.000-07:00

Technology is speeding things up and people feel like everything in their lives should speed up. Spiritual formation takes time. Here’s a quote from an interview with Dr. James Houston in the Denver Seminary Magazine, on spiritual formation and integrity. Responding to a question about speeding up the process of spiritual formation, Dr. Houston says:

"Well, I think the vocabulary is wrong, because it’s all part of living in a technological society. And so processes, procedures, programs are all, in a sense, technical devices or a technical mindset for fixing things. So we want to fix things quickly.

But the very nature of integrity is that we have a speed that is appropriate to what we are doing. The speed of gaining information is very fast, but the speed of godliness is very slow. Or the speed of making a friend is very slow in comparison with other forms. So we lose integrity when we use the wrong mindset or the wrong speed at which we’re operating. My problem is that I can think faster than I can speak, I speak faster than I can act, I’ve got more acts than I’ve got character for… so maintaining integrity is acting appropriately."

These are notes from my friend Peggy Reynoso that we took at one of our Renovare Conferences. Thanks Peggy!

Is Our God Talk Far Ahead of Our Behavior?

2011-08-09T19:46:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned a few posts ago, I've parked myself in the book of James. I've been thinking about silence and how it is good to ruminate on our relationship with God, on what we know about him, and then reflect on whether or not we are really following Jesus. I've said this before; but we mistake God-talk for godly lives. We can talk very sophisticatedly about God and yet live a God-less life. It's a sort of functional atheism. It is also self-deception.

When I was younger and perhaps into my early twenties, I couldn't believe the unfaithfulness of the nation of Israel as recorded in Scripture. Time after time, God did miracles, proved himself faithful, yet they worshipped other gods. They had rebellious spirits and wandering hearts.

The other day I was thinking about it and realized that our church, I'll say the American Church because that is my context, is just like ancient Israel. We are anemic, ill Christians as a whole--although there are many, many, incarnate icons of God walking around and drawing many to him--if we only have eyes to see them.

I think about my own life and wonder if I too am anemic. Where in my life does my God-talk exceed my God-living? Oh there are areas. Yes, there are. When we ask those questions of the Lord he will reveal things to us. For every deficiency in Christ character (deficiency in spiritual fruit) that I have, there is a corresponding fruit of the Spirit that God wants to grow in me.

So there needs to be times of silence and solitude in our lives--communal and individual reflection too--so we can get an idea of what fruit God is trying to grow in us. During these times, we must cease striving to right the wrongs in others and allow God to lovingly till our souls. Silence and a listening ear instead of a wagging tongue allow us to do that. As far as I go, I feel the Lord showing me that I need to train myself to pause when I am naturally inclined to speak. I just need to listen. To listen.

I am a monastic activist by nature--a missional mystic I suppose. But the silence and stillness of the holy is calling to me. I need to reel that activity in. There are a million causes and needs all around me. But I need to retire to my cell, like Jesus, I need to head off to the lonely places in the wilderness to pray and be.

Isaiah 30:15 says, "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength...." That's what I mean. A rhythm of repentance and rest and quietness and trust is calling to me in this season. And as I get into that rhythm, I think that my God-talk and God-life will be more evenly matched. I will choose my words more carefully; my words will count for more.

I think this will be a year of further training in listening to God and others. May God have mercy on me a sinner and give me these graces.

8 Principle Thoughts & Temptation

2011-08-07T18:54:00.000-07:00

The Words of Abba Evagrius (d.399)

"There are eight principle thoughts, from which all other thoughts stem. The first thought is of gluttony, the second, of fornication; the third, of love of money; the fourth, of discontent; the fifth, of anger; the sixth, of despondency; the seventh, of vainglory; the eighth, of pride. Whether these thoughts disturb the soul or not does not depend on us; but whether they linger in us or not and set passions in motion or not--does depend on us."

Bitter Anger Sloshing About

2011-08-04T06:06:00.000-07:00

Have you ever felt trapped by certain circumstances and been chomping at the bit for a way of escape? I have and very recently. In my case, it was a matter of my soul turning sour, acidic. I knew that I was off because negativity was sloshing out of me and spilling onto others. I wasn't being mean to them. No, not at all. However, I was talking too much about my frustrations, frustrations that many of them share, but that had started to consume me. My simmering anger was poisoning me and I fear starting to poison them.

My husband warned me about it the other night. I didn't deny it; I knew he was right. So, I repented then and there.

I am going to have to practice the discipline of silence on this one. Dallas Willard says that the discipline of silence is helpful because it frees us from managing our world through the use of words.

So, I've parked myself in the book of James. And James tells us that anger does not bring about the righteousness of God. My anger is not changing the injustice. But what if I watch and pray and see how God might work without my barrage of words? Without fueling my anger? What if I prayerfully speak when I am sure I have his words? I am not advocating keeping quiet when we should speak up.

But some of us need to learn to be quick to listen, to be slow in speaking and slow in becoming angry.

Our anger doesn't bring about God's righteousness. And sometimes we don't even realize we're angry. I didn't.

Do You Bless Or Curse?

2011-07-31T14:30:00.000-07:00

As of late, I've been thinking in terms of blessing and cursing. Am I a blessing or a curse to my husband and daughter? Are they refreshed by me or drained? Would they rather run into my presence or flee it? What can I do to bless those closest to me and those I come into contact with? I have to think of intentional ways to bless others because I am naturally inclined to look after my own interests and try to attain blessings in my own strength.

Blessing or cursing also seeps into our circles of influence. Do people seek to be around me or do they find ways to avoid me? Each one of us has weak areas. Some of us are impatient and lash out easily; others of us don't speak up when we should. Some of us come off as opportunistic--using others when we believe they'll advance our purposes. People pick up on that.

The question is, are we blind to those weaknesses? Do we push others away when they try to carefront us? Or are we teachable, willing for the Holy Spirit to conform us into the image of Jesus?

Each one of us has many strengths. The question is, are we using those strengths or are we too fearful to use them? Fearful because we are scared of what others will think? At times, I back off with my gifts because I am a woman and my gifts aren't welcomed in certain circles. Sometimes I back off because people are clear they don't want what God has to offer through me (if I were a man, it'd be another story). But doesn't Scripture say "he spread his gifts abroad?" You and I are robbing people of the blessing God has for them when we let fear or circumstances keep us from using the gifts God has given us. Satan delights in our burying and hoarding of God's treasures.

When we fail to exercise our gifts the body of Christ suffers. It's as if a limb or organ is dysfunctional or even dead. And that's a curse.

Why don't you, along with me, think of ways we can be a blessing to others (perhaps that might lead us to decide we need times of silence and solitude--because we are wearing others out by being spiritually and emotionally and physically off). Jesus said that the greatest person in the kingdom will be the servant of all. Servants are usually in the background--seemingly invisible. They often go unnoticed and are sometimes mistreated. Attention is not showered upon them; it is showered upon the master. That's probably why John said about Jesus, "He must increase and I must decrease."

However, you need to know that God sees everything you do. Everything. Genesis tells us he is the God Who Sees. Remember the story of Hagar and Ishmael? If you don't receive the recognition you definitely deserve remember dear one that God sees all things even that which is done in secret. He sees and honors everything done for him in Jesus' name. When all things are made new you will be rewarded for your loving service on his behalf.

Another thought on blessing and service: in John 13, after Jesus washed his disciples feet he said that they'd be blessed if they did likewise. Blessing comes through serving others, as our Lord's glory increases and our self-seeking and self-service diminishes. It is a hard teaching that is nevertheless true.

Do we really seek to be a blessing and not a curse?

Spiritual Renewal

2011-07-24T12:26:00.000-07:00

"Those who study the history of the church have discovered that three elements are generally in place in seasons of genuine spiritual renewal: fervent study of God’s Word, concerted and united prayer, and a willingness to confess brokenness and dependence upon God. These three choices of the will are ones that each person alive today can make… and when we do, the choices of the heart will follow. This is often the time when we see individuals come alive in the love of Christ, filled to overflowing with the fullness of the Spirit."

This comes from The Rev. Dr. Stephen A. Macchia's post "Choices" over at the Conversations Journal Blog: http://conversationsjournal.com/2011/07/choices/.

The Gift and Discipline of Listening

2011-07-23T07:30:00.000-07:00

Do we listen to others?

"Listening is one of the most basic ways we submit to each other. In fact, listening is minute-by-minute submission to others. I clear away what is going on in my mind and I follow what others are saying. I 'die' to my own desires and 'live' to theirs. Loving God and loving others are tied together. Said Dietrich Bonhoeffer, 'He who can no longer listen to his brother will soon be no longer listening to God either; he will be doing nothing but prattle in the presence of God too. This is the beginning of the death of the spiritual life, and in the end there is nothing left but spiritual chatter.' But as we live life in union with God, we become steeped in empathy and genuinely care for other persons. We begin to live our lives in Jesus' attentive presence. This is what life in the kingdom of God here and now is meant to be."

~ Jan Johnson in her book Invitation to the Jesus Life: Experiments in Christlikeness

Life-Transforming Silence

2011-07-22T05:28:00.000-07:00

Only silence will allow us life-transforming concentration upon God. It allows us to hear the gentle God whose only Son "shall not strive, nor cry; neither shall any man hear his voice above the street noise (Matt. 12:19) It is this God who tells us that "in quietness and trust is your strength (Isa. 30:15 NAS).

~ Dallas Willard from The Spirit of the Disciplines

Time and Internet Addiction

2011-07-20T11:12:00.000-07:00

Posting this summer has been haphazard because I've been away visiting family. Our families don't have internet access. So the only way I can get on is to find a hot-spot, usually at a coffee shop. But what I've discovered now as I did while I fasted from the internet and fb during lent is that I don't miss it.

Our internet addictions have robbed us of the life teeming about us. It's like we've entered Plato's Cave. The world outside of the internet becomes the shadows. Addiction is a strong word. But, I'll use it...even for myself.

It's hard for us to conceive of people that spend little to no time on-line. But if I think of it, I know many such people. Most of them are family members, older and younger than me. They're freer. I on the other hand work in an environment where part of my job is to correspond with people all day. Also, I am a writer, so sometimes I'm reading articles in the New York Times or other online venues, trolling for ideas and information.

But, I find it all vexing. Because of the temptation to spend my time doing easy research, or catching up with others in quick bursts, I live a less full life.

I'd rather write letters and have letters written to me.

But letter writing is fading away because people feel they know all there is to know about us. They see it on FB.

The other vexing thing, the temptation I find is, that I start comparing myself to other writers instead of following Jesus. It's the comparison trap.

So as a spiritual discipline, for emotional and spiritual health, I am limiting my interent time now that I am home where I do have access.

Children Following Jesus in Ordinary Time

2011-07-07T06:43:00.000-07:00

My friends Lacy Borgo and Ben Barczi are writing a curriculum of Christ-likeness for children through Renovare. They are both gifted writers. Lacy is especially gifted with communicating to children and in writing for parents who want to teach their children about Jesus. I look forward to their work when it comes out. Go ahead and check out her work here:

http://www.renovare.us/WHATWEDO/Community/Blogs/tabid/2334/EntryID/180/Default.aspx

It is instructive for all adults whether or not you have children.

Clouds and Sky Over The Canary Islands

2011-07-05T09:00:00.000-07:00

Passing on a most beautiful gift! Double click or paste into your browser!

http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap110516.html

APOD: 2011 May 16 - Time Lapse Clouds and Sky Over the Canary Islands

apod.nasa.gov

A different astronomy and space science related image is featured each day, along with a brief explanation.

Climbing Trees To God

2011-07-02T18:47:00.000-07:00

Shawn, Iliana, and I went on a walk this evening after dinner. We do that often. It's sort of our family tradition.We stopped to enjoy one of our favorite groves of trees nearby where we lived. We sat on a park bench and all looked up to the trees and the sky so we could experience them. The trees swayed gently in the breeze. Silence seeped into our souls. Peace. Iliana broke the silence with, "Mommy and Daddy, I want to climb a tree to God." What a beauty-full thought. Trees pointing upward, symbolically pointing toward God and the heavens.

Do we need to climb some trees to God? What turns our souls toward God?

Earlier this year I was in the Rocky Mountains at St. Malo Retreat Center. I remember listening to the wind sing through the trees. I was enamored with the chapel on the grounds, too. I remember turning to leave the chapel and looking at the ground as I climbed down the steps. I nearly forgot what beauty was smack in front of my face: Mount Meeker--nearly 14,000 ft. tall. They call those fourteeners. It was a fourteener and I was missing the peak and the beauty smack dab in front of me because I was looking down. I temporarily forgot to look up!

Gazing upon Mt. Meeker is like climbing a tree to God. It reminded me of strength--of God being our fortress. I could gaze and gaze and gaze at it. And I did during the retreat for almost an hour. I thought of many of the metaphors in Scripture that had to do with mountains. But my point is that I had to look up, to remember to look up, like we looked up at the trees this evening. Looking up and climbing to God.

As we go through our days, let us think about what turns our gaze upward toward God. Let us climb "these trees" to him. And let's remember, like I needed to remember, to look up!

From Resentment to Gratitude

2011-06-28T11:45:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to post on this blog for about two weeks. However, my computer wouldn't let me sign-in. Alas, someone from computer services helped me out today. Do forgive my lapse.

At the beginning of this month I realized something was quite wrong with my soul; I couldn't figure it out though. It was nearly 11 p.m. one night when I said to Shawn, "My soul is sick and I am not sure why." Before I went to bed, I reread a portion from a collection of Henri Nouwen's works in the book Spiritual Formation (with Michal J. Christensen and Rebecca J. Laird).

God used Nouwen to cut me to the quick. I discovered that I was full of latent resentment. Frankly, I didn't know it. But resentment seepage was making its way through my soul, spreading like a cancer. I was aghast at my condition. I had been blind to it. Aren't we all blind to things in ourselves? Of course we are.

So, I began confessing every conceivable thing that I was resentful for. After initially realizing that I was full of resentment, it didn't take me long to start identifying what I was resentful about. Then--Purification. Cleansing.

I also confessed this resentment to my husband Shawn and some spiritual friends, and another lady that serves as sort of a spiritual director. Sometimes we're the last to know what is wrong. But I could tell I was off because internally, I had a critical spirit about several things. Granted, other people do feel the same way I do about these situations that were agitating my spirit, but that doesn't give me an excuse to let particular circumstances rule over me.

I was internally agitated and fuming. The Lord reminded me that if I was to be blameless in such a corrupt generation then I couldn't make a habit of complaining--even internally. But let me not kid myself, my complaints were surfacing more and more frequently sort of like a previously dormant but now active volcano. I was spewing volcanic ashes of complaints to a select few; it wasn't long though before my resentment would poison not only me but those around me. It had to stop.

That's why my soul was sick.

Thankfully, the Lord showed me what the problem was after I had implored him. Since then, I've been thanking him full-throttle for everything I can think of. I am seeking to find the grace in the difficult circumstances, circumstances that fuel my resentment. I can't get into detail here about what they are because of confidentiality. That's probably good; there's really no need to rehash them. I thank God instead of fume the moment I feel any resentment rising. It has set me free. The burden has lifted and I wish the same for you should you find yourself full of resentment.

They Always Say It's The Little Things

2011-06-14T15:32:00.000-07:00

I've been away for nearly two weeks. I've had little access to the internet. I don't own a laptop, so I am dependent on the availability of the internet and of time wherever I am staying. But it has been a good two weeks. In Rochester, NY I conducted a workshop on writing as the mission of God in the world at Northeastern Seminary's Annual Conference on Ministry. Andy Crouch, who wrote Culture Making, was the plenary speaker. He was fantastic, genuine, and knowledgable.

While there, we visited our friends (who are indeed family). I certainly cannot thank God enough for the role that the body of Christ at Rochester Christian Reformed Church has played, and continues to play, in our life. They are our mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers and children.

As we left Rochester, we headed west to Toledo, Ohio to visit my husband's family. We stayed briefly. Just over night, for we were headed northwest to Grand Rapids, Michigan for a wedding. It was beautiful wedding. Our daughter was the flower girl.

We arrived home late this afternoon. Daddy and daughter nap while I catch up and offer some thoughts. I will soon have to wake them for dinner.

On the way home today, I was thinking again about how much little things matter. And isn't the seemingly little things, the things we must do on a daily basis and that our lives are made up of, the hardest? For example, I am to love my the members of my family every day in the little things. Suppose that day after day I don't do that. What role do I then have in the destruction of my daughter's and husband's life? If I don't love them on a daily basis, it'll add up to not loving them throughout my life. Instead of offering them life, I offer them death.

Daily love or lack of love adds up.

Now, I am not responsible for what they do with my love--they could reject it. However, I am responsible to God for doing my utmost to love them.

I fall short. Yes, I do. But, I need to beg God for the grace and the strength to love them. Then I have to decide to love them in his grace and strength.

It's not only love though. Things like exercise and eating right either add up for the good or the bad. The little decisions we make every day about whether to eat right or to exercise add up.

Doing our work well or abysmally every day adds up. So does treating others well or harshly.

Daily communing with our Lord or not communing adds up.

I am not saying anything new; I am just reminding myself and whoever happens to glance at these words of the truth of these matters.

How often do we wish to take a vacation from the mundane because it all seems so meaningless?

Yet, it is in loving God with all of our hearts, souls, and minds in the every day details of our lives that makes holy lives--saints.

I think of the lyrics from the song Day by Day:

Day by day

Day by day

Oh Dear Lord

Three things I pray

To see thee more clearly

Love thee more dearly

Follow thee more nearly

Day by day

O Dear Lord! Have mercy on us sinners! Give us strength to love you in the details of our days. Forgive us for loving ourselves and for loving ease. It's in your name, Jesus, that we pray. Amen.

Would Jesus Throw Up If He Came Back?

2011-06-08T04:13:00.000-07:00

I am on vacation. This is a repost from one of my favorite quotes from Buechner.

"There is the slow poisoning of what we call 'the environment' of all things, as if with that antiseptic term we can conceal from ourselves that what we are really poisoning is our home. It is no wonder that the books and newspapers we read, the movies and TV we watch, are obssessed with the dark and the demonic, are full of death and violence. It is as if the reason we wallow in them is that they keep our minds off the real death, the real violence. And God knows the Christian faith has its darkness and demons too, so discredited by religious crooks and phonies, so distorted for political purposes, and in thousands of respectable pulpits proclaimed so blandly and shallowly and without passion, that you wonder sometimes not only if it will survive but even if it deserves to survive. As a character in Woody Allen's Hannah and Her Sisters puts it, 'If Jesus came back and saw what was going on in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.'"

Frederick Buechner

God's Joy

2011-06-01T18:08:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite excerpts from the Divine Conspiracy. Such freeing truth found here:

"We should, to begin with, think that God leads a very interesting life, and that he is full of joy. Undoubtedly he is the most joyous being in the universe. The abundance of his love and generosity is inseperable from his infinite joy. All of the good and the beautiful things from which we occasionally drink tiny droplets of soul-exhilirating joy, God continuously experiences in all their breadth and depth and richness . . . . Great tidal waves of joy must wash through his being . . . . Now, Jesus himself was and is a joyous, creative person. He does not allow us to continue thinking of our Father who fills and overflows space as a morose and miserable monarch, a frustrated and petty parent, or a policeman on the prowl . . . . So we must understand that God does not 'love' us without liking us--through gritted teeth--as 'Christian' love is sometimes thought to do. Rather, out of the eternal freshness of his perpetually self-renewed being, the heavenly Father cherishes the earth and each human being upon it. The fondness, the endearment, the unstintingly affectionate regard of God toward all of his creatures is the natural outflow of what he is to the core--which we vainly try to capture with our tired but indispensable old word love."

~ Dallas Willard in the Divine Conspiracy pp.62, 63, 64

On The Temptation of Power

2011-05-27T18:02:00.000-07:00

I will continue to highlight the discipline of secrecy. However, I must say that Sharon Hodde-Miller's article on power is excellent. Here is an excerpt: " . . . worldly power is not a neutral entity. It has the potential to change an individual in the most fundamental ways. It can distort our vision by perverting the way we see ourselves and those around us. This means that Christians are to handle power with fear and trembling. Worldly power is not beyond the redemptive work of God, but it is a great seducer that has ruined the lives of men and women throughout history."

See the rest of the article here: http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2011/05/schwarzenegger_strausskahn_and.html#comments

Taming the Hunger for Fame: The Discipline of Secrecy Part 1.

2011-05-19T11:03:00.000-07:00

I am struck by this discipline because it seems that so many of us do not practice it. It is so needed in evangelical Christianity. Most everyone is vying for attention, vying for numbers. Pastors, churches, musicians, writers, media outlets. In our pursuit of numbers, of fame, of notoriety--all in the name of God of course, are we being faithful?

Well, let me not be coy. God has given me the ministry of writing. But I wrestle with my gift all of the time. Because everywhere I turn I hear, "Get more followers! Build your platform! Do something to attract more people to your blog!" One agent told me that I'd have to have 5,000 visits/hits a day to be considered famous enough to be considered. Really there's no chance for me via blogging, unless of course, God makes a way. Perhaps you've heard something along the lines that obscurity is death for an artist--death for a writer.

But then again, I think about how Jesus labored in obscurity for thirty-years. I just cannot take illegitimate actions to try and accomplish only what God can do. I am not saying that I won't continue to write or speak; what I am saying is that I can't take this business into my own hands. God says "no" to me as far as illegitimate self- promotion goes. Perhaps all forms of self-promotion are illegitimate. Christians go back and forth about that. And I am in no way standing in judgment over what others are doing. I am accountable to God for my attitudes and actions though.

The discipline of secrecy is of great help in this area. This disicpline takes all kinds of forms in our individual lives depending on our temptations. Here I will include an excerpt from Dallas Willard's book, The Spirit of the Disciplines, that explains secrecy:

"In the discipline of secrecy--and here again, the word is not perfectly suited to our purposes--we abstain from causing our good deeds and qualities to be known. we may even take steps to prevent them from being known, if it doesn't involve deceit. To help us lose or tame the hunger for fame, justification, or just the mere attention of others, we will often need the help of grace. But as we practice this discipline, we learn to love to be unknown and even to accept misudnerstanding without loss of our peace, joy, and purpose.

Few things are more important in stabilizing our walk of faith than this discipline. In the practice of secrecy, we experience a continuing relationship with God independent of the opinions of others."

pp. 172-173

* More on this in the next post

The Devastation of Divorce

2011-05-18T17:39:00.000-07:00

This is a post that I wrote for Christianity Today's Her.meneutics blog. It was posted today. Dr. Root's suggestions to the church for becoming a community of belonging for children of divorce is also applicable, I believe, for becoming a community of belonging for anyone. The church should be the community of the beloved.

http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2011/05/how_divorce_devastates_childre.html

Dames Rocket: Life on the Edge

2011-05-16T18:55:00.000-07:00

This is a beautiful and honest reflection from a friend of mine who does not want to masquerade in church. I have included the entire reflection below. Do check out her blog: http://leftbehindagain.com/homealone

The first time I saw Dame’s Rocket was in my first Ohio May, and I fell in love with it. I have been partial to purple flowers for many years, and Dame’s Rocket spans almost the entire spectrum of purple: from the palest wisp of purple to a vibrant, full-throated trumpeting of the glorious color – all against the background of the freshest green of new Spring. But Dame’s Rocket is mysterious and sneaky, and you might only see it if you have eyes that seek out blossoms that grow in the wild as mine do. It likes the edges of nature and specifically, the edges between woods and field. Dame’s Rocket seeds itself readily in dappled sunlight but not in complete sun or full shade. It also reminds me of deer that are more often than not seen at the edge of a wood, tails flashing as they disappear into a copse or forest. I feel lucky when I see them, as I do when I see Dame’s Rocket.

Ohio is once again in the season of Dame’s Rocket, and as I drove by woods and fields today, I searched for it. Perhaps not a great idea when one is driving solo, but I couldn’t help it. My eyes have been searching it out for 16 springs now. It beckons me every year, and today I discovered yet one more reason that it calls me so strongly. It is this: I am not unlike Dame’s Rocket. I have lived on the edge of worlds for a good portion of my adult life, and I need to believe that I, too, exist there as a thing of beauty. That when someone searches the between-spaces of life, I will be blooming and showing forth for anyone who cares to observe.

It is not easy living on the edge. If you stop and think about what it really means to live on the edge, it doesn’t take long to figure out that it means that you don’t really belong to one world or the other. Or, if you relate it to the “edgeness” of Dame’s Rocket, a person on the edge may exist partly in one world and partly in the opposite world. Sun and shade, Christianity and secularism, fundamentalism and heresy, political liberalism and conservatism, art and utilitarianism, smoking-hot short skirts and denim jumpers. As I went through today, so many of the things in this aforementioned list reared up and challenged each other, but the one that sucker-punched me was the contrast between fundamentalism and heresy.

It came in the form of an email, an email from someone to whom I am very close. The gist of the email was this: that a guy who has devoted his life to serving Christ in the Mennonite Brethren Church among its youth has been blacklisted from speaking at any Mennonite Brethren youth camps in the future. The reason? He has blogged about prayer labyrinths, U2, dreams, and (gasp!) Rob Bell. The camp director believed that it would put youth at risk if they were to look up his blog, that they may be tempted to leave the faith as a result of reading discussions about such things. In other words, to even discuss these things objectively puts one in the murky places between orthodoxy and heresy, and any person wishing to do so must not be tolerated in the Mennonite Brethren Church.

This comes only a few days after I told a person that the Mennonite Brethren, unlike the Old Mennonite order, do not engage in the practice of shunning. Well, maybe they do and just don’t have the guts to call it shunning. While this is the “same song, second verse” in my own experience over the last 10 years with evangelicals, it is also, undoubtedly, “a little bit louder and a little bit worse” because now it is coming from the denomination in which I first met Jesus.

Jesus. As a child, I loved Jesus immediately. As I understood it, Jesus was the best Christmas present of a Father who was even better than my own father, who I thought was pretty amazing (and still do!). The stories of how Jesus met bad people, loved them, and made them good captivated me. The drama of the death and resurrection of Jesus spoke to the deep places that even a five-year-old can sometimes have. As a result, I went through my early childhood feeling a sense of belonging to a group of people who also loved Jesus. My people defined themselves as a people who believed that loving Jesus and living out the things that he spoke about, especially in the Sermon on the Mount, was paramount to being a part of God’s kingdom.

But over time, American politics has polarized Christian denominations and claimed many of them as its own, even a denomination who used to claim the strongest of allegiances to the Kingdom of God and minimize allegiance to any of the kingdoms of this earth. But now, if I believe in social justice – yes, the kind of Kingdom of God-justice that the Bible talks about – I am suspected of being a heretic and (dare I say it?) unAmerican, which in today’s fundamentalism is the same thing as heresy. If I honestly labor over questions of God’s character, his love and holiness, it is urged by more denominations than I care to think about that I be held as someone not trustworthy to lead the coming generation. Never mind that these are some of the burning questions of this generation.

And I don’t belong in the world of heretics either. I actually believe that there is something to this story of Jesus. I believe that he was the unique God-man who came to bring forgiveness and a new Kingdom that we were commanded to continue building between his appearances. And I believe that Jesus, not man, will be the reconciler of all creation (Col 1). So the liberals definitely don’t want me.

I find myself here, once again, on the edge of orthodoxy and heresy, according to someone else’s definition, but not the definition I see in the Bible itself. I am deeply saddened to think that evangelical faith has been politicized, co-opted by people who do not even claim to be evangelical – Sean Hannity: Catholic, Glenn Beck: Mormon, Michael Medved: Jewish – and rubber stamped by evangelicals who are now toadies of civil religion.

I cannot live in either world. I must continue to exist in the between places of conservative and liberal faith, sun and shade. Some of my leaves and petals are warmed by the sun, and some of them are cooled by the shade. But I cannot exist where it is either only hot or solely cold. To do so would mean death to my soul, to the very elements that make me grow and blossom. And so my commitment to being spriritual Dame’s Rocket on the edge of faith and belief remains. And I hope that one day, I will find that this supernatural purple will have reseeded itself so that there are more and more beautiful blossoms in the wild places between spiritual field and forest. For it is there where much of life’s beauty and mystery is found, and it is there where I am waiting.

A Masquerade Ball in The Church & Christian Institutions?

2011-05-13T20:08:00.000-07:00

"Now that you have purified your souls by your obedience to the truth so that you have genuine mutual love, love one another deeply from the heart. You have been born anew, not of perishable but of imperishable seed, through the living and enduring word of God." I Peter 1:17-23

We always hear, "take your mask off, be yourself." That is good advice. But what if the people around you hand you a mask to wear? What if you find yourself in an environment where people hand you a mask that looks like everyone else's? What if your environment forces you to masquerade because not masquerading will rock the boat and cause those in power to lose control?

This is terrible when it happens in the church and in Christian institutions. And boy, does it happen! There are people who do not want you to be yourself, to think and act for yourself. They maintain control and put on a false front. They foist upon you their masks and get bent all out of shape when you refuse to wear them, when you refuse to play along. Isn't it sickening? Is that what Jesus would do?

Jesus upset the religious people of the day because he didn't play by their arbritary rules or wear the masks that they were foisting upon him. He did anything but masquerade. They tried to mask the face of God. God would have none of it. When he refused, they said he wasn't playing by the rules; he was stirring up revolt. He had a rebellious spirit, they said. They called him Beelzebub.

We do it today. People try to do it to you and me--all in the name of their version of Christianity, not historic Christianity. Here I am not advocating rebellion against Jesus, or sinfulness in order for us to "be ourselves." Nor am I advocating rugged individualism. I am advocating that we allow each other to be the people that God has called us to be. So many people rail against cookie-cutter Christianity, but in the end they'll have nothing else. They can't handle anything else.

Being a non-cookie cutter personailty yet a devout follower of Jesus may lead some to lable you as a trouble-maker, as an insurrectionist. But I say, wherever you are, love and honor those around you, but don't let them mask who God has made you to be. Don't masquerade. Loving them doesn't mean you aquiesce to their sinful attitudes and postures--to their control. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is live and speak the truth in love.

Ugh. I have to say it again: masquerading is sickening. It's untruthful and lacks integrity. It is playing to the crowd and people pleasing. It accomplishes little--doing more harm than good. If you put a mask on, that's out of fear and perhaps self-protection. If someone tries to force a mask on you--that is diabolical control.

Let us, as Peter said, love one another from the heart with a mutual love. May we not force our political leanings, denominational preferences, or belief about peripheral doctrines upon one another. God is not threatened by who we are, why should we be? If others are while we are obediently following Jesus, let God be true and every man or woman a liar.

Monastic Mentality Saves The World

2011-05-10T08:09:00.000-07:00

A Repost:

When I was younger, I couldn't figure out why on earth certain monks and nuns took vows of silence. It seemed like an empty ritual. How foolish I was! I now realize these silent monastics are acutely aware of the toxic waste that flows from their mouths. They keep silence to save the earth. Perhaps I should join them.

Advice to those of us who consider ourselves righteous but have no control of the tongue: Let's be eco-friendly. Let's keep our mouths shut!

Some Truth About The Christian College Experience

2011-05-06T19:22:00.000-07:00

I work on the campus of a Christian university. I love the students and my coworkers. It's a great place. But I need parents to know: it's not heaven on earth. Some parents think that by sending their precious babies to a Christian school or university that they'll protect their children from evil in the world. It's not true. Evil and brokeness are within all of us and therefore within our Christian institutions.

So, everything that students experience on a secular college campus is here. The difference is that hopefully, the administration/faculty/staff handle it from a Christo-centric perspective. More times than not that is the case, yet even that isn't always guaranteed to happen.

Students struggle with porn, drug addictions, from parental abuse, depression, cutting, gender identity, lawlessness, drinking, stealing, hypocrisy, legalism, arrogance, materialism, greed, perfectionism, doubt, premarital sex etc. Yes, even students from Christian homes. We want to model following Jesus to our students, but parents must remember that the school environment is not Jesus the Messiah. It doesn't save their students. Each student has the responsibility to follow Jesus. The school is not going to follow Jesus for them.

And while I think a Christian university is a wonderful thing for many, for some it is more damaging than a secular institution. For some, being at a secular university is better than being at a Christian one. Deciding whether or not to send your child to a Christian university is a process that requires discernment.

Great Post Over At Rachel Held Evans' Blog

2011-05-05T12:06:00.001-07:00

http://rachelheldevans.com/ask-yourself-jamie-wright-worst-missionary

Using God For Our Own Advancement

2011-05-03T06:04:00.000-07:00

This is a follow up post from a question from Mark over at: http://forestinabottle.blogspot.com/

He wondered what I or Henri Nouwen was getting at in my post "The Temptation To Be Relevant."

I posted an excerpt from Henri Nouwen's book In The Name of Jesus. It is a book geared toward Christian leaders, but applies to any believer. Here I will further explain what I think of Christians seeking fame and glory.

Most of the time we don't admit to it. But what starts out as our effort to use the gifts God has given us can subtley turn into a venture in making a name for ourselves all in the name of Jesus. Being famous or well-known doesn't imply that one is a glory robber (robbing glory from God) and that one is seeking relevance at all costs. However, somtimes it is the case (and actually probably more often than we like to admit) that life becomes almost solely about the advancement of our own reputation and influence and not the advancement of the Kingdom of God although we might tell ourselves and others that's the case.

How do we know? Well, that's what silence and solitude is for. It is what close relationships are for. Many times even non-believers see it as clear as day, they see it often before Christians do. We need others to speak truth to us and we need to listen to it. We need to know when we start to turn phony.

Perhaps we no longer spend time in prayer or with God. We minister without the life of God coursing through us. Maybe just trickling through us. Ministry becomes a profession. Pastors, worship leaders, and other ministry staff aren't walking with Christ but are still able to give a performance. It can happen to any one of us. And that is when ministry becomes about us. We care not so much about advancing God and his ways, but of advancing our own notoriety.

Seek God not relevance. Relevance will follow.

That doesn't mean that we don't do our work, or don't do it well, or seek new avenues of ministry. It means our first aim isn't to be relevant. Our first aim is to follow Christ. I truly believe that if we follow him, he'll provide the audience and the people who are to hear/read/be ministered to.

Let God bestow glory on us. Let him promote us as we are faithful to him. He will. Do not Peter and James tell us, "Humble yourself in the sight of the Lord and he will lift you up?" (I Peter 5:6, James 4:10).

Thank you for the question.

Here is further explanation from the late and wise Andrew Murray:
http://www.worldinvisible.com/library/murray/5f00.0565/5f00.0565.12.htm

Stealing Praises

2011-04-30T12:53:00.000-07:00

"One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, 'Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?' Then he said to him, 'Rise and go; your faith has made you well.'" Luke 17:15-19

Have you ever had someone take your idea and run with it? Or perhaps a boss/supervisor take credit for your ideas and work? I have. It is so frustrating. Perhaps you've labored for other's behalf, for their good without receiving so much as a thank you. Maybe like me, if you think about it too long, a twinge of bitterness unfolds within.

I think of Jesus healing the ten lepers. Not only did he heal them from sickness, but he delivered them from insults hurled at them, from begging, from societal shame. Once they were considered nobodies, pariahs, by those around them. Daily dehumanization. Now, because of Jesus' touch, they were normal. They treasured normal. Normal meant they could now work to provide for themselves and family. Normal meant they could go wherever they wanted--from the village market, to the temple, to visit family without having to yell, "Unclean! Unclean!"

Only one, a Samaritan at that, returned to heap thanks and praise upon Jesus. Jesus notices him and publicly applauds his act of faith.

Recently, when I was overlooked, I thought to myself, "Well really Lord, the glory is supposed to go to you. Really." I remembered that he notices what we do in secret. I also remembered Colossians 3 where Paul admonishes us to do all for the glory of God, not for our own glory.

It should be enough for us to get our reward in heaven, even if we don't get it in this life. And many who get acknowledgment in this life--if they've done acts of righteousness for the wrong motives--may not get acknowledgment in the life to come.

God sees us though. God sees, even if no one else does. And if our obedience and love bring him joy and glory, let us be content that one day we'll get acknowledgment, we'll get a pat on the back from him. This is what we must tell ourselves for it is true and it will squelch bitterness.

The Temptation To Be Relevant

2011-04-27T20:23:00.000-07:00

These are Henri Nouwen's words from his book, In The Name of Jesus. It is a book for Christian leaders.

"Jesus' first tempation was to be relevant, to turn stones into bread . . . . Aren't we priests and ministers called to help people, feed the hungry, and to save those who are starving? Are we not called to do something that makes people realize that we do make a difference in their lives? Aren't we called to heal the sick, feed the hungry, and alleviate the suffering of the poor? Jesus was faced with these same questions, but when he was asked to prove his power as the Son of God by the relevant behavior of turning stones into bread, he clung to his mission to proclaim the word and said, 'One does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God' (Matthew 4:4) . . . .

Beneath all the great accomplishments of our time there is a deep current of despair. While efficiency and control are the great aspirations of our society, the loneliness, isolation, lack of friendship and intimacy, broken relationships, boredom, feelings of emptiness and depression, and a deep sense of uselessness fill the hearts of millions of people in a success-oriented world . . . . And the cry that arises from behind all of this . . . is clearly: "Is there anybody who loves me? Is there anybody who cares? Is there anybody who wants to stay home for me? Is there anybody who wants to be with me when I am not in control, when I feel like crying? Is there anyone who can give me a sense of belonging?

It is here that the need for a new Christian leadership becomes clear. The leaders of the future will be those who dare to claim their irrelevance in the contemporary world as a divine vocation that allows them to enter into a deep solidarity with the anguish underlying all the glitter of success, and to bring the light of Jesus there.

Solitude and Silence For the Sake of Others & More . . .

2011-04-25T12:49:00.000-07:00

This is a reflection from my friend Jean Nevills, a fountain of wisdom--way up there near Portland, Oregon. Thank you Jean for these good words, words flowing from your solitude and silence!

Happy Easter Monday!

I was sitting this morning with the post-resurrection scenes in John 20 with Mary Magdalene, Peter and John, and especially with Thomas when I was surprised by the gospel writer (John) interrupting his gripping narrative. If it were a movie, there would be a freeze-frame with this voice-over:

“Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come (continue) to believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have Life in His Name.” Jn.20:30-31

It would have been enough for me to stay with Mary and Jesus in the Garden –or with the disciples in that locked room, or with Thomas in his doubting against all hope because it was all so impossible enough to stay with their bewilderment and dismay, their relief and confusion, their anxiousness, doubt, and wonder—that is enough to live with for a while.

But I was moved by John’s interruption of the narrative at this point because I felt his grasp on my shirt collar that pulled me into the Story. The inclusion surprised me, much like the way the Arsee Oromo surprised us at Kosovo when they put a robe upon our shoulders to honor us and made us part of them. Their story became my story that day in Ethiopia.

It was that kind of pull that I felt when I hit verse 31. At this point, the story is not only about Mary and the other disciples. The story is also about me. About my moving from wanting to believe to believing that Jesus is God’s Christ, and mine; that I may have Life in His Name—in His character and realty. Unlike Thomas who doubts against all hope until he can see to believe, I hope against all my doubts that believing, I may see, and clearly, my Lord and my God. And I pray for his Life to be realized in me.

John interrupted his narrative because the whole point of writing it was for my sake—or to borrow from Ruth Haley Barton’s chapter title: For the Sake of Others. Like John, she gets the point that is beyond writing the narrative, beyond practicing Silence and Solitude:

“…. the practices of solitude and silence do, in time, bring us full circle—back into life in the human community. Whether we have been away for a half an hour of solitude, and an extended retreat time or have dropped completely out of sight for a whle, God, in his time, does eventually bring us back to the life he has given us. Perhaps nothing in our external circumstances has changed, but we have changed, and that’s what our world needs more than anything. Without pressing or pushing or trying to do great altruistic deeds, we discover that much that happens in solitude and silence ends up being ‘for others’—as paradoxical as that may seem.” Pg. 131

In some ways, it relieves the guilt of “not getting anything done” by our practice, because, after all it ends up being for others, particularly the others that our life is lived in closest proximity with. And after it has its effect on us, it may even change them. And change our families, our work places, and eventually our world. I am hoping for that, I am looking for that, I am believing for that.

He Trusted Him Enough.

2011-04-22T13:27:00.000-07:00

It struck me that Jesus trusted the Father enough to die. When he said, "Father take this cup from me," What was he expressing? Fear? We're not completely sure. Theologians argue about it. We know Jesus was sinless. He chose the Father's will even though it appeared crazy to those closest to him. He knew the Father. He knew the Father to be good. Father loved him and the world and wouldn't put him through this in vain. Father knows best. Do we know our Father well enough to believe he knows best? To believe that he will do good to us?

*Thank you Jesus for giving us life through your death.

Tripping Jesus.

2011-04-19T07:31:00.000-07:00

"Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.” Matthew 16:23 (NIV).

It happens often in the life of faith. We are following Jesus but suddenly and subtly we veer off into a way of thinking and being that drives us to search for ways to use God in order to promote our own interests. Remember Peter? He had his own way of thinking about bringing forth the Kingdom of God and how Jesus should ascend to power. Maybe he didn't realize it until Jesus (in Matthew 16) started describing how things would go down. Maybe he didn't realize what lay within himself until he blurted out, "never Lord." After all, he was only trying to protect Jesus; persecution, torture, humiliation, and death weren't in his plans for bringing in the Kingdom of God. How could they be in anyone's plans? Well, it turns out such was God's plan.

Peter was a stumbling block to Jesus. Does God trip over us?

Are we confusing human concerns, our concerns, with God's concerns? Are we so foolish to think that our ways of doing things are necessarily God's ways? We start to get presumptious. Our ego and its desires, our way of bringing in God's kingdom, are not always God's way. And we get frustrated with God when he doesn't do what we want when we want it and how we want it. We throw tantrums.

You see this is true with Christians leaders, in poiltics, within our families, and within ourselves. Before we dogmatically declare that our way of doing something is Christ's way, let us check with the Lord, with a discerning Christian community.

May we not trip Jesus up in our eagerness to do God's work.

Think Twice About Others . . . C.S. Lewis

2011-04-17T11:34:00.000-07:00

“It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics."

In C.S. Lewis' sermon "The Weight of Glory"

Spiritual Fog

2011-04-14T12:42:00.000-07:00

During Lent I will not be writing new posts but will be scheduling old posts to be reposted. These are some that I think are dandy. Blessings to you these 40 days as you walk with Christ through the wilderness.

Last week while in Rochester, NY for my husband's Ph.D. graduation, we made our way east on the SeawayTrail to Pultneyville, NY. We were headed to Bob Foreman park where we could eat lunch with an unobstructed view of Lake Ontario. Prior to moving and having our daughter Iliana, we'd picnic there on Sundays or during a weekday when we were both off. I'd read or pray or nap as I lazily listened to the waves lap the shore. Not only is the park one of our favorite places, but the drive there is, too. However, last week as we made our way there, we couldn't see the lake because of fog. It was sunny, around sixty degrees and 1:00 p.m. in the afternoon. Yet, the fog hadn't lifted! Shawn was disappointed; so was I. We had been telling our three-year-old daughter Iliana and his mother (grandma) about our favorite place.

We kept driving anyway hoping to see the lake when we arrived. We couldn't! From the parking lot, one always gets a good view of the lake. Not that day! I think visibility was about two feet. We walked right up to the edge of the three foot drop-off to the rocky beach. We could barely see the water from there. Shawn, Iliana, and grandma continued down to the water's edge to skip rocks. I decided to sit down on a bench and contemplate the water I couldn't see because of the fog. I'd wait for the sun to burn off the fog while we were there.

I couldn't see beautiful Lake Ontario because of the fog although it was right in front of me. That happens when we are in a spiritual fog. Remember Joseph (whom I often recall)? He thought he was going to get out of jail but was forgotten. He thought after he interpreted the dream for the cupbearer that he'd be out. Not so. Spiritual fog can result from disobedience, or it can result from the disappointment with God when he doesn't act or answer the way we expected him too. We've obeyed. We've prayed. We've served. Still nothing. We can't see a thing. Can't see an answer. That day, I was reminded that the answer can be right in front of our eyes, but we may not see it. Lake Ontario was right in front of us, but we couldn't see it because of the thick blanket of fog. We had to wait for the sun to burn off the fog and it started to before we left, although not completely.

We have to wait for God to burn off the spiritual fog, the fog of confusion or disillusionment. Then we'll able to see. When he does, we'll see clearly, even if it's from the vantage point of the next life.

Wrath: Seven Deadly Sins

2011-04-12T11:17:00.001-07:00

Wrath (Anger or Rage) - impatience, hostility, resentment, desire for revenge, retaliation, sarcasm. According to Lance Webb, "self-love striking out with hostility and resentment at those threatening or getting in the way of the fulfillment of the image of one's vision." Rooted in self-pity. Quick temper. According to Guinness, "studied degradation of another . . . a complete denial of his or her worth . . . a desire to hurt, in contempt, the perpetrator doesn't care whether the other is hurt or not--he or she is not worth such a moment's consideration. Holding others in contempt makes it easier to hurt or degrade them again and again. Stems from feelings of inferiority or impotence. http://www.whitestonejournal.com/ say that impatience with the faults of others is related to wrath/anger.

The virtue is kindness.

I never though about anger being related to self-love. These clarifications on the seven deadly sins give us a lot to think about, a lot to repent of don't they?

Hell & Contentment

2011-04-11T07:41:00.000-07:00

Merriam-Webster

blessings plural of bless·ing (Noun)

1. God's favor and protection.

2. A prayer asking for such favor and protection.

This is hell: to not see or refuse to see God right in front of us. To be ungrateful for his millions of blessings all around us. Surrounded by God but not seeing him. Surrounded by God but having contempt for him because he is the potter and we are the clay when really we live like we wish the opposite to be true.

This is hell: to think badly and rudely and harshly of God when he is full of love, joy, grace, and compassion and will freely give us all things. He is a just judge.

We must think magnificently of God. He is more magnificent and good then we can imagine.

This is hell: to have eternal treasures before us--all goodness--all beauty--all truth and to refuse it. That is what Satan did. And what we do time after time.

God help us to see and be grateful.

C.S. Lewis on Writing/Writers Getting Over Themselves

2011-04-09T17:03:00.000-07:00

One of the people I truly admire and want to emulate (Jan Johnson), a modern day Amma, sent me this quote from Lewis:

From the age of sixteen onwards I had one single ambition (becoming a successful writer), from which I never wavered, in the prosecution of which I spent every ounce I could, on which I really and deliberately staked my whole contentment: and I recognise myself as having unmistakably failed in it. I feel that I have some right to talk to you as a man in the same boat.

The side of me which longs, not to write, for no one can stop us doing that, but to be approved as a writer, is not the side of us that is really worth much. And depend upon it, unless God has abandoned us, he will find means to cauterise that side somehow or other. If we can take the pain well and truly now and by it forever the wish to be distinguished beyond our fellows. And honestly, the being cured, with all the pain, has pleasure too: one creeps home, tired and bruised into a state of mind that is really restful, when all one’s ambitions have been given up. Then one can really say for the first time, “Thy Kingdom come.” For in that Kingdom there will be no pre-eminences and a man must have reached the stage of not caring two straws about his own status.

Think how difficult that would be if one succeeded as a writer: how bitter this necessary purgation at the age of sixty, when literary success had made your whole life and you had then got to begin to go through the stage of seeing it all as dust and ashes. Perhaps God has been specially kind to us in forcing us to get over it at the beginning. We have got to die.

I would have given almost anything -- I shudder to think what I would have given if I had been allowed - to be a successful writer. I am writing this as I do simply and solely because I think the only thing for you to do is absolutely to kill the part of you that wants success.

Fleeing Adultery

2011-04-08T12:19:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd refer you to this post I wrote for Christianity Today on their Her.meneutics Blog about a year ago. Perhaps you or someone you know could benefit from it:

http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2010/05/toying_with_adultery.html

Blessings,
Marlena

The Temptation For Writers and Artists and Poets and Musicians and Pastors

2011-04-07T11:41:00.000-07:00

. . . for all of us really. This comes from the Great Divorce By C.S. Lewis (one of my favorite books of all time). pp. 84&85

"'When you've grown into a Person (it's all right, we all had to do it) there'll be some things which you'll see better than anyone else. One of the things you will want to do will be to tell us about them. But not yet. At present your business is to see. Come and see. He is endless. Come and feed . . . . '

It was all a snare. Ink and catgut and paint were all necessary down there, but they are also dangerous stimulants. Ever poet and musician and artist, but for Grace, is drawn away from love for the thing he tells, to love of the telling till, down in Deep Hell, they cannot be interested in God at all but only in what they say about Him. For it doesn't stop at being interested in paint you know. They sink lower--become interested in their own personalities and in nothing but their own reputations.'"

Resentment

2011-04-05T00:00:00.000-07:00

Nouwen on Resentment.

Here are Nouwen's comments in the context of Matthew 20:28 where James and John via their mother ask Jesus for the seats to the left and right of him when his kingdom comes.

"We, like the sons of Zebedee, want to be near power and reflected glory. And if we cannot sit on the throne we at least want to sit very close to it. If we do not dare to ask for this privilege ourselves, we let someone close to us ask for it. Jesus's teaching here is a reminder of our temptation to be like God, and of our resentment for not always being first in line or highly privileged. If we cannot attain the first place, we'll settle for the second place in the kingdom. Those who perceive themselves worthy of first place but have to be content with second place can only look upward with resentment and downard with suspicion. And then, in this competitive and jealous place, neither God nor humanity can be served.

When you cling to your complaints, your heart is full of resentment, and there is no room for God to enter and set you free. Resentment curtails the movement of the Spirit and diminshes the kingdom within. It replaces, faith, hope, and charity with fear, doubt, and rivalry. It makes an enormous difference in our personal and communal lives whether we respond to life in anger and resentment, or in love and gratitude."

This is from the book: Spiritual Formation: Following The Movements of the Spirit

--Henri Nouwen's work with Michael Christensen and Rebecca J. Laird. I highly recommend this book. Thank you to Christensen and Laird for putting these pieces of Nouwen's published and unpublished works and lectures together. We are indebted to you!

Vow of Stability

2011-04-04T20:16:00.000-07:00

We are but flesh, a passing breeze that does not return (see Psalm 78:39).

God is stable...he changes not. His character changes not. However, everything else in life, is in a sense, unstable. We are but flesh, a passing breeze that does not return (see Psalm 78:39). Yet, how we long for stability in our own lives! Rootedness in God and in a community. An anchor. Is it possible?

Could it be that we play a part in the stability we long for? Can we remain present in a particular place to particular people even though it may cost us personal success? Could we stay put and present in our particular community? Would we stay for the good of others and ourselves--only moving if God moves us?

Quoting Father Guy, a monk from Blue Cloud Abbey, Dennis Okholm writes in his book, Monk Habits for Everyday People, "God has placed us in a community of people with whom we would not have chosen to live had it been up to us."

Continuing on the thought of stability, Okholm notes, "But it means more than just remaining in place. Stability means being faithful where we are--really paying attention to those with whom we live and to what is happening in our common life. In fact, persevering in stability is really persevering in listening. A person who stays where God has put her (not in abusive situations of course) because it is with that group of folks, speaking the truth in love, that she will grow up with them 'to maturity, to the measure of the full stature of Christ,' as Paul puts it to the Ephesians (4:11-16)."

He explains further, "Conversion and growth in character happen when we remain, not when we run. This is where the vow of stability links up with the vow of conversatio moralis (conversion of life).

To remain stable and present to others where we are would indeed require a conversatio moralis for many of us. But the concept of being present and faithful to God and to those around us--moving only if we are called to move--some would say forced to move--is something we have to think about.

Monk Habits for Everyday People pp. 90,91,92.

From A Front Porch To A Patio

2011-04-02T11:27:00.000-07:00

This is a very interesting article about the reason for this online magazine/blog. Our space shapes us. I stumbled upon it and thought that you might want to think about what is said:

http://www.frontporchrepublic.com/2009/03/front-porch-republic/

Drowning Splashes

2011-04-01T18:06:00.000-07:00

This is an observation made from Susanna over at Wishful Thinking:

"I was talking to Jonathan one night and he said the most interesting thing. He said, “It’s the drowning person who makes the most splashes in the water.” I thought about this for a long time. I’m still thinking about it. For so long I was drowning. I made a lot of noise. I splashed a lot. I didn’t want to slip silently beneath the waves. Some of this blog was about that for me. I desperately needed someone, anyone, to see, to know what I was feeling. I didn’t want anyone to have just a vague idea of my struggle. I wanted to capture it in words, pin it down long enough to name it. I think there were times when I did, but words always fall short. Words are never enough. The greatest griefs are silent. So I felt that I needed a period of re-examining the motivation for my words. I needed a period of stillness."

You can read more at: http://susanna-wishfulthinking.blogspot.com/

Christians and Depression

2011-03-31T20:13:00.000-07:00

There are numerous reasons for depression. I can't account for all of them. Do people suffer more from depression today than in the past or is just more widely talked about? I don't know. There's all sorts of forms of depression like spiritual depression, biological depression, event-triggered depression or a combination thereof.

What is a depressed Christian to do? I am going to offer some suggestions and perhaps a kernel of hope to those of you suffering from depression or for those of you with close friends and/or loved ones suffering.

1. Tell Somone (trustworthy). Many are ashamed of their depression and so they suffer and spiral down in silence. Insecurity, self-loathing, and embarrassment keep them from going to other trustworthy people in the body of Christ, people who would gladly help bear their burdens. If you are suffering from depression, please do not let lies or shame keep you from confiding in another trustworthy person. Tell of your depression and confess your sins if need be so that you might start to be healed. There are plenty of people who want to walk alongside of you and pray for you. God is here. However depression often mutes your perceptions of his presence. One of the most tangible ways you will experience God's love, especially in this darkness, is through loving, trusthworthy, people in the body of Christ. If you are reading this and haven't told a soul, now is the time to speak--to someone trustworthy--to someone who won't brush you off or offer trite answers.

2. Take Thoughts Captive. This requires your constant effort and continued vigilance. You feel awful--like you're looking up at rock bottom. You cut your soul with the words you say to yourself. It's easy to cling to everything awful and untrue while in this state. It is harder to tell yourself the truth about God, yourself, and life because you don't feel the truth or because you don't believe it.

This is where you have to often go contra feeling. Your depressive feelings and thoughts become obsessive. It has become easier to swallow lies than truth. However, you have to combat them with truth even if you don't believe the truth right now. For example, you might have thoughts and feelings such as, "No one cares about me. No once cares whether I live or die. God could care less about me." That is untrue. But you don't feel the truth only lies. Even so what you might do is start listing off the people that care about you. There must be at least one. And also, try to find verses in the Bible that speak of God's care and his love. The Psalms are wonderful. I think of excerpts from Psalm 145 (NIV):

The LORD is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. The LORD is good to all; he has compassion on all he has made. The LORD is trustworthy in all he promises

and faithful in all he does. The LORD upholds all who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down. The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time. You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing."

And even if you don't feel thankful for anything, start listing off the things you have to be thankful for. Like a roof over your head and food. And if you don't have that you can be thankful that you are alive and for the computer that you have that enables you to read this. We all have blessings to count and things to be grateful for even if we aren't feeling particularly thankful.

Another thing you might think about is the fact that many in Scripture and throughout history either suffered from depression or had bouts of depression or dark nights of the soul where God seemed silent. Think of Elijah, David, Jonah, St. Paul, Charles Spurgeon, Martin Luther, and Mother Teresa. This fact probably doesn't make you feel better but it helps to know that you're not alone.

Think magnificently about God and not evil of him for he is not evil and means to do you good. In him there is no darkness at all.

3. Exercise and Get Outside. This is a hard one because for some people the hardest thing to do on any day is to get out of bed. But whether inside or out walking/exercising will be good for your soul. It'll get the endorphins going. For some readers it may mean putting snowboots on and trekking out in front of the house on a blustery day for a few minutes. The act of getting up and getting outside even in the cold will shed a bit of relief on a numbed soul. If you can't do it alone could a friend or family member walk and/or exercise with you on a weekly basis?

4. Maintain a Routine. This is the hard part. You might want to sleep in or neglect your job/other duties...maybe your children. You just don't have the motivation or the energy to care. If you choose to give into those feelings troubles begin to pile up and make you feel like you're drowning. Don't give up! It is time to go contra your energy and feelings again. Doing what you have to do even though you have no ounce of desire to do it will help maintain your soul's health. It is possible. You might need accountability partner and some help. Please tell someone if you do. A loving friend/family member can try to keep you accounable.

5. Counseling. Pastoral Care. Maybe you can't afford a counselor. Maybe you can. Many counselors or social workers have sliding fee scales to help. Some churches have counseling centers and may be able to help you if you're having trouble paying. Some offer free counseling. It is helpful to have someone to talk to. Alert the caring leadership/pastors of a church. If you don't go to a church, maybe you could ask around for a good church. Churches often have reputations you know, and so people in your area will know where to refer you. It is good for the godly leaders of a church to know of your situation so that they can rally around you and rally others around you.

6. Medication. See a doctor and tell her/him of your situation. There might be some other medical cause for your depression. I realize that some churches/pastors teach that Christians shouldn't take medication for depression. That just isn't true. Some have biological issues/psychoses that necessitate medication. You and your doctor can discuss that. Obviously one shouldn't over medicate or use medication in lieu of dealing with their issues. But sometimes medication under a doctor's supervision is necessary. If you don't have medical insurance, search for a free clinic and/or let your church know. Thank God that we now have medications to help people that we didn't have a hundred years ago.

7. Read. Read scripture and stories of saints and others who have overcome adversity and difficult circumstances to gain encouragement and hope. It can do you untold amounts of good.

8. Humor. Find people, read about, or seek healthy situations that make you laugh. It will be good for you.

9. Remember. All the times God has been good to you and delivered you in the past. That'll give you reason to believe that he will be good to you now and in the future. Recall those times as often as possible.

10. Prayer. Cry out to God as much as you are able and have others pray for you. God hears. God hears. He does hear. And he cares deeply for you. God answers prayer.

* climbing out of depression is a process. There is no formula and it doesn't happen over night. Some people struggle throughout their lives...but it doesn't have to be something you go through alone or as awful as it is now. Please seek help. And realize that my list is not exhaustive nor a formula. Hopefully it is something to cling to in the wilderness of depression. I pray God's blessing on you. Love to you in Christ.

Porn & The Good. The True. The Beautiful.

2011-03-31T06:00:00.001-07:00

The other day as I was doing some research, I stumbled upon the website of a glossy women's magazine. I was thoroughly disappointed but not shocked to find the magazine unashamedly promoting porn. It's not just a men's issue anymore. Porn and talk about porn is trendy. The porn industry and its consumers are successfully marketing themselves to adults and children. Christians aren't exemplars in this area either. Many believers are trapped in the throws of a porn addiction and need support from the body of Christ to help free them from slavery. But lest you think I am merely going to rail against porn in this post, I raise the issue because something greater is at stake. I fear that many of us do not have large souls nor large imaginations. We have not tasted of the beauty and goodness of God. We salivate over vile paltry things, laying our lives down for innumerable death-filled hoaxes that consume us. But God, through the good, the true, and the beautiful calls to us. He calls us to something higher, to beautiful, good, satisfying, healthy life. He calls to us in the streets, in creation, in our lives, through beautiful music, literature, art, films, the church, and others, perhaps through this post. He calls to us most loudly through Scripture. But more often we choose death instead of life because we don't know what life looks like, what it tastes like. But we do get hints of it in the good, the true, the beautiful, in this life. All of the time. God's fingerprint and life-filled breath is all over the universe. If we cannot see, if we cannot taste or feel it, perhaps our senses are out of whack. We are sick or bent up. That is the reality of sin.

So if you are drowning (whether a Christian or not) and have little hope, if you know that there has got to be more to life than this, please receive this answer: there is. God has not abandoned you to death or a meaningless, beautiless, pitiful, existence. God in Christ calls out to you and wants to set you free to live and to taste of the good, the true, and the beautiful in the midst of a suffering world. And then you too can tell others that what the ancients have been saying about God in Christ is true, because you experienced it (it is true regardless of our experience, but we are better able to explain that which we experience).

Although I am not saying that the theology in this particular song is completely accurate, I think the song Viva La Vida by Cold Play hints at what I've been talking about in the post. Coldplay hints at that which is beyond us (the good and the beautiful calling out to us). They sense it and I think we can sense it in their song. I post it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dvgZkm1xWPE

Tomorrow, I will let C.S. Lewis speak to this topic.

May you taste of God today in the good, the true, and the beautiful that Christ has brought to us in creation and through his resurrection.

God Leaves Life in His Wake (Beholding and Becoming II)

2011-03-30T05:38:00.000-07:00

"Grant that . . . that we may be made like him in his glorious and eternal kingdom.” (Collect BCP, Year C Sunday closest to November 9)

“For I know that my Redeemer lives, and that at the last he will stand upon the earth; and after my skin has thus been destroyed, then in my flesh I shall see God, whom I shall see on my side, and my eyes shall behold, and not another.” Job 19:25-27

“ But at my vindication, I shall see your face; When I awake, I shall be satisfied, beholding your likeness.” Psalm 16:17

“Indeed they cannot die anymore, because they are like angels and are children of God, being children of the resurrection. And the fact that the dead are raised Moses himself showed, in the story about the bush, where he speaks of the Lord as the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob. Now he is not the God of the dead, but of the living; for to him all of them are alive.” Luke 20:36-38

Lean in and pay close attention to my words. I’ve happened upon the message of my life and perhaps the single most important thing I can tell you. Remember it. Turn it over and over in your mind until it saturates your soul. Until you absorb it and live it. As you do, as you practice this truth, God will perpetually birth new life in you. For it is God who gives life to all living things. And life, God’s life, the eternal life flowing through your veins (if you are in Christ), and through all of creation is indescribably good and beautiful and wholesome and sustaining no matter the circumstance. The apostle Paul and saints throughout the ages attest to this truth.

Here it is:

Pay the utmost attention to God. Set your gaze on him, behold him, see him, do whatever necessary to keep laser focus zeroed in on him. Keep a single eye on him. As you do behold him, you will not conform to the pattern of this world—the pattern of death, but will be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:1,2).

More and more you’ll live and breathe life. To change the metaphor, as you behold him, his streams of living water, his life, will continually fill you to the brim and flow through you into the lives of others. Think of it as unleashing a dam of life-giving water. This overwhelming force of gushing water cuts a canyon through hard-rocked souls leaving every form of life in its wake. Not a perfect metaphor by any means. Do forgive me. I’ll work on it. But that’s one picture I have of God’s life in us and in the world. As Jesus says in Luke 20:38, “God is not the God of the dead, but of the living.”

God leaves life in his wake. Not death. Do you believe this?

Job did. After all the hell he went through, despite all he suffered, or maybe because of it? Though certainly none of it was his own fault, he said, “For I know that my Redeemer lives, and that at the last he will stand upon the earth; and after my skin has thus been destroyed, then in my flesh I shall see God, whom I shall see on my side, and my eyes shall behold, and not another.”

As your gaze locks on to God, You will have abundant life (John 10:10). You will become whole, holy--like Christ--conformed into his image (Romans 8:29). As father Greg Boyles says, you will experience the Japanese concept of amae, that is, you will live in a deep sense of being loved and cherished by God. As our eyes are locked on him, God’s love will melt away all in us that is not of him. Again as Father Greg Boyle notes, this is a love that, “. . . melts you. It doesn’t melt who you are but who you are not” (Tattoos on the Heart, 103).

Dallas Willard writes, “I realize that I will either allow my view of evil to determine my view of God and will cut him down accordingly, or I will allow my view of God to determine my view of the evil and will elevate him accordingly, accepting that nothing is beyond his power for good” (Renovation of the Heart, 109-110).

But what if we have bad eyesight? What if we are allowing our view of evil to determine our view of God? What if we are blind? Then we ask God to let us see. We ask for healing. And in the mean time, if we can’t see clearly, we trust those who have better eyesight. My husband Shawn has 20/15 eyesight. I cannot clearly see things that are far away. I prefer that he drive at night and especially when it is dark and raining hard. If we are in the darkness, because of whatever form of suffering, or because of doubt, or depression, or because we have not held our gaze on God, or for whatever reason, even if it’s not our fault, like it wasn’t Job’s. Listen. Trust the eyesight of those who have better vision.

Granted, I understand that as Paul says, in this life, we see through a glass darkly. But even in this life, there are those who can see better than others. If we are honest with each other, we know this to be true. This is a sober truth. God forbid that we allow ourselves to be lead by blind guides or by those who have poor eyesight. They may be sincere and well-meaning. But they very well might lead us to our death. As Jesus says in Matthew 6:22, “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light.”

May I offer practical ways to behold God? These are not exhaustive and in no particular order.

1. Scripture Reading and Memorization
2. Reading books
3. Beholding the beauty of Creation
4. Beholding the beauty of others
5. Contemplating the good, the true, and the beautiful in whatever form
6. Through lovely or even heart-wrenchingly beautiful music
7. Through little children
8. Through art
9. Through Church History and sayings fo the saints
10. Our employment
11. Through service to others, especially the poor
12. Through Prayer
13. By contemplating God's attributes
14. Through the elderly
15. Through the body of Christ
16. Through Christ

*There are many other ways. Perhaps you can share some with us.

Blessings to You.

Why Are There Still Atheists?

2011-03-28T20:16:00.000-07:00

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2011/marchweb-only/whytherearestillatheists.html

This is an article that my husband wrote. It appeared on Christianity Today online earlier today.

Unleashing The Fires of Hell Upon Me Through Your Tongue

2011-03-27T18:41:00.000-07:00

The fallout effects of the tongue
Part 1

I’ve been hit! I’ve been hit! I think I’m about to die. You wanted to get something off of your chest so you sprayed bullet words. Projectiles that tore through me -- and you don’t even care! I think they hit a major artery. I think I’m fatally wounded. There’s searing pain, blood all over. I can’t breathe! I don’t know if I’m going to survive.

And you know what? You barely even know me. That’s why one of hardest things for me to do is to forgive you when you don’t see or admit that you’ve done anything wrong. I offended you, but you murdered me. You walk away, leaving me to die. But you’re guilty of murder.

You think you’re such a great Christian because you are active in church. You go to Bible study or sing in the choir or in the praise band, or are a Sunday school teacher or an elder. But you think nothing of murdering me with your words.

“Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue is also a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell” (James 3:5-6).

Part 2

There’s something about me that you don’t like. So you’re bound and determined to right the wrong in me. It isn’t a major character flaw, but it sends you into a rage. It’s as minor as leaving a dirty cup out, forgetting to put it in the sink. But it enervates you. You think you have a right to express whatever’s on your mind. So, you unload on me in an effort to beat the hell out of me. You pummel me. I guess you think I’m your verbal punching bag.

You think you’re such a great Christian because you are active in church. You go to Bible study or sing in the choir or in the praise band, or are a Sunday school teacher or an elder. But you think nothing of beating me up with your words.

“Don’t you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man unclean. For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. These are what make a man unclean” (Matthew 15:17-20a).

Part 3

You smile at me, but you turn around and stab me in the back. You smile at me but there are daggers behind your eyes. All your friends know how you feel about me. Your family does too. Because of you, people look at me differently. How dare you smile at me? You don’t mean your smile. Why don’t you just come to me and work it out? It would be so much easier that way. But you don’t.

A while ago, I tried to talk to you but you deny that there’s anything wrong. Yet, you keep nursing your grudge. Don’t think that I don’t know. Your inner thoughts are affecting how you treat me and see me. You’ve pegged me. You won’t let me climb out of the pigeon hole you’ve put me in. You think you know me. But you are looking at me through a keyhole and making judgments. How can you think that you know all about me and my character when you see me through such a limited vantage point? Maybe, just maybe, things aren’t what they seem. You are slandering me behind my back and in your heart. You refuse to forgive me. Yet, I must forgive you even though you won’t forgive me. It’s only in Christ that I can. I cannot do it by myself.

You think you’re such a great Christian because you are active in church. You go to Bible study or sing in the choir or in the praise band or are a Sunday school teacher or an elder. But you think nothing of stabbing me in the back. You think nothing of your unforgiveness.

“Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. "The servant fell on his knees before him. 'Be patient with me,' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. "But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded. "His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.' "But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. "Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. "This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart" (Matthew 18:25-35).

Part 4

Your words are sprinkled with sarcasm. Your words give me little cuts. But you smile and say you’re just joking. You ask me, “Why can’t you take a joke?” You say, “Quit being so serious.” But you always find ways to get a dig in. Your put downs are serious even though you deliver them with a smile. You wound me again and again. Sometimes I think you intend to cut me with your words. Maybe I’m wrong though. Maybe you’ve gotten so used to putting me and others down that you don’t recognize it in yourself.

You think you’re such a great Christian because you are active in church. You go to Bible study or sing in the choir or in the praise band or are a Sunday school teacher or an elder. But you think nothing of murdering me with your words. But you think nothing of slicing me with your words, all the while with a smile on your face.

“Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. But I tell you that men will have to vie account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted and by your words you will be condemned” (Matthew 12:33-37).

Lust: Seven Deadly Sins - Virtue: Self-Control

2011-03-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

Lust: According to Os Guinness and others, "idolizing of sex in the sense of an unethical and unrestrained expression of the sexual impulse (promiscuity, pornography, adultery, incest, seduction, prostitution, and unnatural vice). Characterized by self-deception and dehumanization. Sexual activity whose ultimate expressive purpose is violated for the sake of immediate sexual pleasure.

This observation on Lust vs. Self-Control is straight from http://www.whitestonejournal.com/

They say it better than me anyways.

Self-control and self-mastery prevent pleasure from killing the soul by suffocation. Legitimate pleasures are controlled in the same way an athlete's muscles are: for maximum efficiency without damage. Lust is the self-destructive drive fore pleasure out of proportion to its worth. Sex, power, or image can be used well, but they tend to go out of control.

Back to my own thoughts. If you are trapped by lust or sexual sin, feel that you have the scarlet letter branded on to you and you can never escape, know that Jesus can set you free. I don't say that lightly, I mean it. He is powerful enough. This sin doesn't have to have mastery over you. Day by day trust Christ, tell someone trustworthy in the Christian community that you want to be free. He will set you free as you trust him daily and renounce this sin. I am not saying it will be easy or that you might not have some set backs. But God is more powerful than lust.

Envy: Seven Deadly Sins

2011-03-24T06:00:00.000-07:00

I continue sharing my notes on the seven deadly sins.

Envy

Sorrow for another's good. Wishing to see other's brought low because you cannot rejoice in their good fortune. Usually we're envious of those doing something similar to us, those with the same passions, gifts, hobbies, line of work, or a similar calling. According to Lance Webb, envy is self-love unable to permit anyone to rise or excel above one's own superiority, with resulting hate, jealousy, intolerance, prejudice, slander, gossip, and use of sarcasm or more violent means of leveling others to one's own height.

The opposite virtue of envy is love.

I quote from http://www.whitestonejournal.com/ again:

Love is patient, love is kind. Love actively seeks the good of others for their sake. Envy resents the good others receive or even might receive. Envy is almost indistinguishable from pride at times.

Back to my own thoughts.

Does envy and pride keep many in the church from working together? I think so. If a church or denomination does not minister our way, or even think our way, sometimes we let those things keep us from working together for the common good, those differences keep us from furthering the kingdom of God and create internal, familial squabbles and even wars. This too is sin. We can all find common ground to further the cause of Christ, even if we do not worship together, can't we?

artwork from: http://fineartamerica.com/images-medium/moodpainting-5-green-with-envy-angela-mustin.jpg

Greed: Seven Deadly Sins

2011-03-22T06:00:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd share some notes I've collected about the seven deadly sins.
After all, we are to repent when necessary. These notes are taken the whitestone journal (http://www.whitestonejournal.com/), The Catholic Encyclopedia, Phyllis Tickle's Greed, C.S. Lewis' Mere Christianity, Kathleen Norris' Acedia, Lance Webb's Conquering the Seven Deadly Sins and Os Guiness' Steering Through Chaos, and my own experience.

Greed (Avarice) - can be disguised as thriftiness. Phyllis Tickle notes it is, " the sin of apostasy, of desiring life subject to human control over a life of vulnerable trust in the unseen." A fear of helplessness or loss of control can turn into a lust for power as a way of presenting an undesirable situation. Coventeousness.

From http://www.whitestonejournal.com/

Power

In this form, earthly goods are chiefly a means to an end . . . to achieve personal power. These things can be used to intimidate or bribe others, reinforce one's own illusions about what is important or to build up a feeling of success. The real problem here is a desire for power rather than actual greed.

To destroy our desire for power, we must be generous in granting power to others. When appropriate, be submissive to others. Avoid jobs that are a temptation for a "power grab." Share credit for successes with others, and claim a fair share of responsibility for failures being blamed on others. The idea is to stop trying to control everything and everyone.

The Greed of Fear

Fear is a poor motivator for virtue, but an excellent one for greed. Sometimes greed is simply to have so much that we can't possibly run out. If we acquire enough stock, real estate . . . we think we will be safe from want. This is an illusion.

Part of the cure may be to embrace poverty. We may not become homeless, but we can learn to do with less. "Live simply that others may simply live." Once this kind of freedom is practiced, we realize we don't need much anyway.

Japan. Self-Denial. Humility. Charity.

2011-03-12T07:44:00.000-08:00

There has been a horrific earthquake and tsunami in Japan. With the world I pray for those immediately affected and as well as family and friends far an near. Lord have mercy on them and send your help! May we help however we can.

Here is William Law to tell us about what such a Christ-life would look like:

William Law (1686-1761)

"If self-denial be a condition of salvation, all that would be saved must make it a part of their ordinary life. If humility be a Christian duty, then the common life of a Christian is to be a constant course of humility of all kinds. If poverty of spirit be necessary, it must be the spirit and temper of every day of our lives. If we are to relieve the naked, the sick, and the prisoner, it must be the common charity of our lives, as far as we can render ourselves able to perform it. If we are to love our enemies, we must make our common life a visible exercise and demonstration of that love. If content and thankfulness, if the patient bearing of evil be duties to God, they are the duties of every day and in every circumstance of our life. If we are to be wise and holy as the newborn sons of God, we can no otherwise be so but by renouncing everything that is foolish and vain in every part of our common life. If we are be in Christ new creatures, we must show that we are so by having new ways of living in the world. If we are to follow Christ, it must be our common way of spending every day."

A Serious Call To A Devout And Holy Life p. 51-52.